I'm sitting here on the couch, looking at boxes stacked around me, the cats sleeping - one on the couch, one on the floor - watching the First 48 on A&E, and trying to will away a nervous stomach.
See, here's what happens in Kim's World...I make a plan, I try to stick to the plan, I get my ducks in a row, and then I stress out when the plan doesn't go quite as I planned. Really if you know me, that doesn't surprise you. It's one of my only faults. ha! I've said it before and I'll say it again - I must actually think that I can control all the circumstances. I mean - don't you know - my plan is the one to stick with? Which reminded me that sometimes some of the best things in life happen outside of my plan.
You see, 7 years ago I was a stay at home mom - pretty much living the only life I had ever imagined and really ever wanted to imagine. I loved being home with JD, being a homemaker, and never wanted anything outside of that. Little did I know that less than three weeks later I would be going through a divorce, feeling like my entire world was turned upside down and wondering how in the world I was going to make it on my own. I was working night shift at Waffle House - and for those of you wondering if you make good money at Waffle House - you might, but not if you're working the one behind Winn Dixie on Blue Angel Parkway. ha! To say I was struggling, would put it mildly. Not just struggling financially, but emotionally, and any other way you could imagine. I put a brave face on, smiled when I had to, cried when nobody was looking, held onto JD for all I was worth, and did some serious talking with God. I mean I pretty much told Him how I felt about everything - and it wasn't all good, but it was honest. I felt let down, heartbroken, disillusioned, angry, sad, old, overwhelmed, - but never never did I feel hopeless. I felt cautiously optimistic at times, even excited to see how this would all play out, at others. I realized that divorce was not the hardest thing I had ever been through, and that just like I got through the other, I could make it through this. I just really didn't know how. I would cook Ramen or hot dogs when JD was with his dad so I could afford to make a "real" meal when he was with me. I would lie awake at night and worry, and worry, and then worry more. This was DEFINITELY NOT my plan.
However, almost 7 years later, it is amazing to see the process this has been. I worked at Waffle House, where I met several people who worked at the Oyster Bar on Perdido Key, who encouraged me to get a job there. I was hired the day I applied. I then got a second job working at Baptist Hospital, where I met a doctor, who would in turn put me in touch with a lady named Patricia Breeland, who would give me an opportunity to start with the Andrews Institute after Hurricane Ivan destroyed the Oyster Bar. From there, I left Liberty Church Blue Angel campus to help start North Campus, where I met Heather Slane, who would put me in touch with a job where I was an Executive Assistant for a lady with a local company - and through that experience, I had the skills and the confidence to apply for the job that I have been at for almost four years.
The day I moved into this apartment, it was cold, dreary and I was just so sad. It was my first time staying by myself overnight. Seriously. Ever. I was almost 25 and had never stayed in a house by myself overnight. This week, when we leave this apartment, it will almost seem like a lifetime ago. In some ways it is. In the past seven years, I've cried a lot, laughed even more than I cried, watched my son grow into almost a teenager, learned how to be a working mom, and who Kim really is. I have made new friends, lost a great friend to cancer, become closer to my sisters than I could have ever imagined, met people who have changed my life, learned how to bake a pretty awesome (if I do say so myself) carrot cake, focused on what was best for my child - not always what was easiest for me. I have discovered that I can say no. I can think for myself. I can state my opinion. I have kind of become a bit of a book hoarder - evidenced by the fact that I overwhelmed the Goodwill guy tonight will all the books I gave away. ha! I had added to the fine lines on my face, fallen down the stairs (literally) five times, and fixed my own toilet (yes, I'll be proud of that until the day I die). Most importantly, I realized that I can still love with all my heart.
After Hurricane Ivan, I can remember driving around and looking at houses and feeling so sad thinking that I would not be able to afford a house for me and JD. Housing prices were through the roof and I was still barely making it. So, if I seem a little emotional, excited, or just plain out crazy over the fact that we will be closing on a house this week, please know it really is just because this day seemed almost impossible to me not too very long ago. I am sure I will cry when we close. Heck, to be honest, I am crying now. Not because I am sad, but because I am so absolutely overwhelmed with thankfulness at how a plan that was not my plan is turning out. It's turning out to be a plan I could have never imagined - and I'm so thankful that my plan isn't always the one that is followed.
In closing - here are a few, very superficial, things I'm looking forward to about living in our house - not necessarily in order:
1. Being able to play Just Dance without worrying if the downstairs neighbors are going to get ticked off at us jumping around. Heck, we're gonna stay up until Midnight and jump rope in the house on the first night - just because we can.
2. Not having to take the trash down the stairs, to the car, to the dumpster - which never fails is always overflowing with yucky trash.
3. Getting to park in the garage - and not having to wait for the car to defrost to leave the house.
4. Not having people leave trash, half eaten pizzas, or rotten Jack O'Lanterns on our front doorstep.
5. Not having to carry 40 pounds of cat litter upstairs - cause y'all know I like to buy in bulk.
6. A nice large pantry to free up some space in my kitchen cabinets.
7. Neighbors to get to know - and a neighborhood to walk in.
Okay, this list is getting long, so I think y'all get the point. This could go on all night. ha!
This is an amazingly beautiful life, and I'm thankful for this opportunity.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Questions...
Almost every year at this time, I write a blog about my mom - only fitting, since yesterday was her birthday. Maybe it is because I am getting older, and know there are some things I will always wonder about, but I find myself wishing I could sit down with her as an adult and ask her certain questions. Here are some of the ones I would ask:
What do you think of how we all are turning out? Can you believe that Zachary is old enough to be in the military? What was it like growing up and have a birthday one day apart from Uncle Ernie? What was it like to have five kids by the time you were the age I am now? If you could travel any place in the world, where would it be? When people say we look alike - especially our mannerisms - do you see it? What is the real name for the "pink stuff" dessert we used to eat at Thanksgiving - nobody can seem to remember.
I would sit down and tell her that she was a mother to some of the strongest people I know. I would tell her how I'm amazed that I'm old enough to have a son taller than I am. I would share with her the heartache that went with getting divorced, the confidence that came from making it on my own, and the absolute excitement at building not just a house, but a home for me and JD. I would tell her how thankful I am that Mae-Beth has found Scott and they are going to start a beautiful life together. How he fits right in and made lumpia to add to our Thanksgiving meal. I would tell her how we all know we will cry when we see Maebs in her wedding dress - and we'll be laughing about all of us crying.
If you are fortunate to have your mother into adulthood, I would suggest getting to know her - not just as your mom, but as a person. As someone who has hopes, dreams, thoughts, hurts, disappointments, triumphs, and trials. There might come a time when you wonder about some of these things, but won't have the opportunity ask...
So, Happy Birthday - one day late - to the woman responsible for bringing me here. Thanks for this amazing gift of life. May I do everything I can to make each day better than the one before.
What do you think of how we all are turning out? Can you believe that Zachary is old enough to be in the military? What was it like growing up and have a birthday one day apart from Uncle Ernie? What was it like to have five kids by the time you were the age I am now? If you could travel any place in the world, where would it be? When people say we look alike - especially our mannerisms - do you see it? What is the real name for the "pink stuff" dessert we used to eat at Thanksgiving - nobody can seem to remember.
I would sit down and tell her that she was a mother to some of the strongest people I know. I would tell her how I'm amazed that I'm old enough to have a son taller than I am. I would share with her the heartache that went with getting divorced, the confidence that came from making it on my own, and the absolute excitement at building not just a house, but a home for me and JD. I would tell her how thankful I am that Mae-Beth has found Scott and they are going to start a beautiful life together. How he fits right in and made lumpia to add to our Thanksgiving meal. I would tell her how we all know we will cry when we see Maebs in her wedding dress - and we'll be laughing about all of us crying.
If you are fortunate to have your mother into adulthood, I would suggest getting to know her - not just as your mom, but as a person. As someone who has hopes, dreams, thoughts, hurts, disappointments, triumphs, and trials. There might come a time when you wonder about some of these things, but won't have the opportunity ask...
So, Happy Birthday - one day late - to the woman responsible for bringing me here. Thanks for this amazing gift of life. May I do everything I can to make each day better than the one before.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Thanksgiving Cornucopia...
Say it with me - Corn-u-cop-ia...now, isn't that a fun word to say? =)
As I'm sitting here, on this morning before Thanksgiving - having procrastinated almost as much as you can about writing a Thanksgiving blog - I was thinking about all the things I'm thankful for (naturally) and how I could put that into words without sounding the same as every year before hand.
The truth of the matter is, while I am thankful for much of the same things every year, I never want my thankfulness to become routine. I never want it to be words spoken, but never fully appreciating the real value of the gifts I have been blessed with. After all, isn't it the people or things in our life that we've had to sacrifice the most for, or that other people have sacrificed the most for us, which we are most grateful? So, while you read my list items, and notice how many of them will be the same on your list, take some time to specifically remember why these are most valuable to you.
First and foremost - I am thankful for a loving Saviour who sees my faults, my needs, my joys, my sorrows, and meets me where I am. I would not be where I am today without having His hand in my life.
I am thankful that I get to be JD's mom. If he stumbles across this entry, I'm sure it will embarrass him, but I truly feel blessed with him as my child. He makes me laugh, he humbles me with his thoughtfulness - yes, he occasionally has a smart mouth (can't imagine where he gets that from), and all in all he is a 12 year old boy, but a better child I could not have asked for. Each year, I look forward to enjoying right where we are, but also seeing the amazing person he is turning out to be. It's a pretty incredible journey - one I would not trade for all the gold in the world, and one in which I realize just how quickly life can pass, so cherish every moment.
I am grateful - every single day - for my immediate family. Truly only those who lived in our house, will ever really fully understand what that was like and will share those experiences - as is the case with every family. I love that as adult we can call each other friends, and although we are different in some ways, we are alike in ways that make us fundamentally who we are. I never smell honeysuckle or see hydrangeas growing in a yard, without thinking of our youth. I'm proud of all of you and your accomplishments, and although we have all joked that God must have been having an off day or at least a sense of humor kind of day when he mapped out who would be in this family - I actually think He did a darn good job. And on a trash talking side note: I cannot wait until we throw down on our annual Thanksgiving kickball game. Yes, the older sisters usually win, but I think the team Maebs and I are on will have this one...and if not, we've got it next year. Hey, we're younger...eventually we will have youth on our side. That might be when y'all are pushing walkers, but still. ha!
I am thankful for friends who are my family by choice. I have been blessed with a few people who are like family to me. I might not say that I love y'all all the time, but I really do. I a thankful for the ones who have only been in my life a few years, and thankful for those who have stood the test of time. The ones who only know the Kim I am today and the ones who can remember the scraggly skinny blond hair, blue eyes, talk too much, girl I was growing up. Okay, so I still talk a lot. =) And....I REALLY love that so many of y'all have trucks and trailers and have actually volunteered to help me move. Awesome! Don't worry, you'll at least get a dinner out of the deal. Well, and the sense of accomplishment. ha! Seriously, I am thankful for these friendships. I don't even have to name names because y'all know exactly who you are.
Each year, I say I'm thankful for my job - and at the risk of sounding hokey - I am truly very thankful. My job has allowed me to meet some of the very people who fall in the above category. I know - shocking - being real friends with your co-workers. Whoever heard of such nonsense? After all, they are my work family. Heck, we live in cubicle world - there is no way you don't get a little personal information living in cubicle world. I am thankful work at a place where I actually enjoy going to work. Yes, I enjoy my vacation, too. =)
I am grateful for this country I get to call home - and all the men and women in our armed forces who are doing their part to make sure it stays that way. Which this year, stretched to include my oldest nephew, Zachary. I could not be more proud of the decision he made to join the Army. He is currently deployed to Afghanistan for the next year - which leads me to the next thing I am grateful for - all the moms, dads, husbands, wives, sisters, children....who are here trying to make a life while their loved one is away. I pray for the safe return of all of our soldiers, and a peace for all of their family members left here. Too many times, the family members are unsung heroes...doing what needs to be done on the home front.
And last, but certainly not least, I say it all the time and I will say it again. I am truly, wonderfully, overwhelming thankful for this beautiful gift of life. I am thankful each day to get up, have a new start, and forge out the path that will ultimately be my life's journey. I count each day a blessing and I hope to not take a single moment for granted. It reminds of the lyrics to a Rascal Flatts song -
I'm gonna stop looking back, Start moving on
Learn how to face my fears
Love with all of my heart, Make my mark
I want to leave something here
Go out on a ledge without any net
That's what I want to be about
I want to be running when the sand runs out
I hope each of you have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
As I'm sitting here, on this morning before Thanksgiving - having procrastinated almost as much as you can about writing a Thanksgiving blog - I was thinking about all the things I'm thankful for (naturally) and how I could put that into words without sounding the same as every year before hand.
The truth of the matter is, while I am thankful for much of the same things every year, I never want my thankfulness to become routine. I never want it to be words spoken, but never fully appreciating the real value of the gifts I have been blessed with. After all, isn't it the people or things in our life that we've had to sacrifice the most for, or that other people have sacrificed the most for us, which we are most grateful? So, while you read my list items, and notice how many of them will be the same on your list, take some time to specifically remember why these are most valuable to you.
First and foremost - I am thankful for a loving Saviour who sees my faults, my needs, my joys, my sorrows, and meets me where I am. I would not be where I am today without having His hand in my life.
I am thankful that I get to be JD's mom. If he stumbles across this entry, I'm sure it will embarrass him, but I truly feel blessed with him as my child. He makes me laugh, he humbles me with his thoughtfulness - yes, he occasionally has a smart mouth (can't imagine where he gets that from), and all in all he is a 12 year old boy, but a better child I could not have asked for. Each year, I look forward to enjoying right where we are, but also seeing the amazing person he is turning out to be. It's a pretty incredible journey - one I would not trade for all the gold in the world, and one in which I realize just how quickly life can pass, so cherish every moment.
I am grateful - every single day - for my immediate family. Truly only those who lived in our house, will ever really fully understand what that was like and will share those experiences - as is the case with every family. I love that as adult we can call each other friends, and although we are different in some ways, we are alike in ways that make us fundamentally who we are. I never smell honeysuckle or see hydrangeas growing in a yard, without thinking of our youth. I'm proud of all of you and your accomplishments, and although we have all joked that God must have been having an off day or at least a sense of humor kind of day when he mapped out who would be in this family - I actually think He did a darn good job. And on a trash talking side note: I cannot wait until we throw down on our annual Thanksgiving kickball game. Yes, the older sisters usually win, but I think the team Maebs and I are on will have this one...and if not, we've got it next year. Hey, we're younger...eventually we will have youth on our side. That might be when y'all are pushing walkers, but still. ha!
I am thankful for friends who are my family by choice. I have been blessed with a few people who are like family to me. I might not say that I love y'all all the time, but I really do. I a thankful for the ones who have only been in my life a few years, and thankful for those who have stood the test of time. The ones who only know the Kim I am today and the ones who can remember the scraggly skinny blond hair, blue eyes, talk too much, girl I was growing up. Okay, so I still talk a lot. =) And....I REALLY love that so many of y'all have trucks and trailers and have actually volunteered to help me move. Awesome! Don't worry, you'll at least get a dinner out of the deal. Well, and the sense of accomplishment. ha! Seriously, I am thankful for these friendships. I don't even have to name names because y'all know exactly who you are.
Each year, I say I'm thankful for my job - and at the risk of sounding hokey - I am truly very thankful. My job has allowed me to meet some of the very people who fall in the above category. I know - shocking - being real friends with your co-workers. Whoever heard of such nonsense? After all, they are my work family. Heck, we live in cubicle world - there is no way you don't get a little personal information living in cubicle world. I am thankful work at a place where I actually enjoy going to work. Yes, I enjoy my vacation, too. =)
I am grateful for this country I get to call home - and all the men and women in our armed forces who are doing their part to make sure it stays that way. Which this year, stretched to include my oldest nephew, Zachary. I could not be more proud of the decision he made to join the Army. He is currently deployed to Afghanistan for the next year - which leads me to the next thing I am grateful for - all the moms, dads, husbands, wives, sisters, children....who are here trying to make a life while their loved one is away. I pray for the safe return of all of our soldiers, and a peace for all of their family members left here. Too many times, the family members are unsung heroes...doing what needs to be done on the home front.
And last, but certainly not least, I say it all the time and I will say it again. I am truly, wonderfully, overwhelming thankful for this beautiful gift of life. I am thankful each day to get up, have a new start, and forge out the path that will ultimately be my life's journey. I count each day a blessing and I hope to not take a single moment for granted. It reminds of the lyrics to a Rascal Flatts song -
I'm gonna stop looking back, Start moving on
Learn how to face my fears
Love with all of my heart, Make my mark
I want to leave something here
Go out on a ledge without any net
That's what I want to be about
I want to be running when the sand runs out
I hope each of you have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Monday, August 9, 2010
Oh The Joys Of Parenting...
I will have to say that the best gift I've been given is my son. Shocking, huh? I bet y'all couldn't have guessed that one. =) Just ask my co-workers, they pretty much know that I'm all about some JD. Let's be real - just ask anyone who has known me for more than 5 minutes.
So, in that I'm going to start by telling you some things that I cannot do for JD...some of these will be trivial, and some not so much...
I cannot, right at this moment take JD on an expensive vacation, he's not getting an iPhone anytime soon, can't run out and buy him anything his little heart desires, and not matter how I try, I will never be able to be both mama and dad to him. That's just not possible.
However, let me tell you some things I can do....
I can sit with him and watch TV (whatever he wants to watch), talk about video games, cook dinners for him, teach him to cook dinner for me, tuck him in at night, sing to him in the morning, help him with his homework, dry his tears when he cries, teach him about love by showing him love and by even correcting him, listen to his opinions, play board games, go for walks, and many more things that money can't buy.
It seems lately that I have been sadden by some people's approach to parenting. Now trust me when I tell you that there are only two pieces of parenting advice that I will ever give:
1. If you make every decision with your child in mind you can't really fail. Meaning that - no matter what - if you do what is best for your child (including discipline) then I don't think you can fail as a parent.
2. You have to realize that you are raising an adult. You aren't raising a child. You are raising someone you want to be a productive, well adjusted, adult one day. They just start out in mini form. ha!
However, sometimes I think people mistakes being able to buy everything for their children with being a great parent. Okay, who wouldn't want to just be able to hand their children everything? Okay, who would also admit that the things you value the most are things you've worked hard to obtain? So, maybe our kids don't need everything to be happy...they just need one thing. Us. It's that simple. They just need us to invest our time into them. It's a simple concept really. Take one child add some parents (or one parent if that's all there is) and add some time. It will equal moments that you will not be able to replace.
I will say that I probably value my time with JD now even more so than I did when I was a stay at home mom. Even though I wouldn't have thought that possible then, I can see now that I always assumed things would be the way they were. I would be a stay at home mom, JD would go to school and I would be waiting for him at the bus or volunteering with his class. I never dreamed that I would share custody with his dad and be a full time employee - full time mom. It's been hard sometimes to balance that "I've got to get to work" with "I want to sit on this couch and just make time stand still while we talk and watch cartoons". My mother's guilt comes out at some of the strangest times, but you know what? I think if you asked JD he would tell you 100% there is no doubt I love him and care about his everyday life.
So, I know this has been rambling on, and I know that I am not a perfect parent. Shoot, I've made mistakes. Yes, I've allowed JD to eat chocolate pudding for breakfast. However, I just wanted to put a reminder to myself - and to anyone else who might come across this - that our children are our biggest future investment. I don't want to look back one day and think of this poem:
If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
Diane Loomans, from "If I Had My Child To Raise Over Again"
I want to look at my son one day and know that I soaked up every minute that I could. I want to remember that the future is coming fast enough - today should be enjoyed now.
So, in that I'm going to start by telling you some things that I cannot do for JD...some of these will be trivial, and some not so much...
I cannot, right at this moment take JD on an expensive vacation, he's not getting an iPhone anytime soon, can't run out and buy him anything his little heart desires, and not matter how I try, I will never be able to be both mama and dad to him. That's just not possible.
However, let me tell you some things I can do....
I can sit with him and watch TV (whatever he wants to watch), talk about video games, cook dinners for him, teach him to cook dinner for me, tuck him in at night, sing to him in the morning, help him with his homework, dry his tears when he cries, teach him about love by showing him love and by even correcting him, listen to his opinions, play board games, go for walks, and many more things that money can't buy.
It seems lately that I have been sadden by some people's approach to parenting. Now trust me when I tell you that there are only two pieces of parenting advice that I will ever give:
1. If you make every decision with your child in mind you can't really fail. Meaning that - no matter what - if you do what is best for your child (including discipline) then I don't think you can fail as a parent.
2. You have to realize that you are raising an adult. You aren't raising a child. You are raising someone you want to be a productive, well adjusted, adult one day. They just start out in mini form. ha!
However, sometimes I think people mistakes being able to buy everything for their children with being a great parent. Okay, who wouldn't want to just be able to hand their children everything? Okay, who would also admit that the things you value the most are things you've worked hard to obtain? So, maybe our kids don't need everything to be happy...they just need one thing. Us. It's that simple. They just need us to invest our time into them. It's a simple concept really. Take one child add some parents (or one parent if that's all there is) and add some time. It will equal moments that you will not be able to replace.
I will say that I probably value my time with JD now even more so than I did when I was a stay at home mom. Even though I wouldn't have thought that possible then, I can see now that I always assumed things would be the way they were. I would be a stay at home mom, JD would go to school and I would be waiting for him at the bus or volunteering with his class. I never dreamed that I would share custody with his dad and be a full time employee - full time mom. It's been hard sometimes to balance that "I've got to get to work" with "I want to sit on this couch and just make time stand still while we talk and watch cartoons". My mother's guilt comes out at some of the strangest times, but you know what? I think if you asked JD he would tell you 100% there is no doubt I love him and care about his everyday life.
So, I know this has been rambling on, and I know that I am not a perfect parent. Shoot, I've made mistakes. Yes, I've allowed JD to eat chocolate pudding for breakfast. However, I just wanted to put a reminder to myself - and to anyone else who might come across this - that our children are our biggest future investment. I don't want to look back one day and think of this poem:
If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
Diane Loomans, from "If I Had My Child To Raise Over Again"
I want to look at my son one day and know that I soaked up every minute that I could. I want to remember that the future is coming fast enough - today should be enjoyed now.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
All The Single Ladies...
I read a friend's blog earlier this week and she was asking why we don't celebrate being single. Well, we must have been on the same page, because I have been wondering the same.
Being 31 and single, I often encounter people who give you the look of pity and say things like "Your time is coming", "God has a plan", and "Don't worry, you're still young". Here's a newsflash and I really don't mean this ugly, but I already know all those things. You know what else? I don't exactly feel like I'm lacking or somehow defunct because I am not in a relationship. Let me tell you what being single has taught me....
Being single has taught me the joy of being alone and not lonely. During this time, I've really learned who Kim is...not just the mama part of me (which tends to be the person I am most the time), but the part of me that fundamentally makes me who I am. I have fixed my own toilet, plunged my sink, taken out trash, hung curtains, moved furniture, and all kinds of other things that I know I would have relied on someone else to do.
I too often hear people - mostly women - who seem to feel incomplete because they are not in a relationship. My only advice to them is that you need to be complete in yourself before you are in a relationship with someone else. Usually when I say that I get questions that pretty much mean "You're a man hater, aren't you?" I hate to disappoint, but no, I'm not a man-hater. =) I don't want to burn my bra in protest, have only female animals, or join a book club where women sit around and discuss Oprah book club books, the latest movie on Lifetime, and entertain everyone with how someone did me wrong.
I guess my question is: Why isn't okay just to be where you are? I understand that we all have dreams and goals in life, but take some time to enjoy right where you are today.
So, in conclusion...I'm 31, single, yes, I have two cats - no, I'm not crazy, and all in all it's a pretty beautiful, amazing life.
Being 31 and single, I often encounter people who give you the look of pity and say things like "Your time is coming", "God has a plan", and "Don't worry, you're still young". Here's a newsflash and I really don't mean this ugly, but I already know all those things. You know what else? I don't exactly feel like I'm lacking or somehow defunct because I am not in a relationship. Let me tell you what being single has taught me....
Being single has taught me the joy of being alone and not lonely. During this time, I've really learned who Kim is...not just the mama part of me (which tends to be the person I am most the time), but the part of me that fundamentally makes me who I am. I have fixed my own toilet, plunged my sink, taken out trash, hung curtains, moved furniture, and all kinds of other things that I know I would have relied on someone else to do.
I too often hear people - mostly women - who seem to feel incomplete because they are not in a relationship. My only advice to them is that you need to be complete in yourself before you are in a relationship with someone else. Usually when I say that I get questions that pretty much mean "You're a man hater, aren't you?" I hate to disappoint, but no, I'm not a man-hater. =) I don't want to burn my bra in protest, have only female animals, or join a book club where women sit around and discuss Oprah book club books, the latest movie on Lifetime, and entertain everyone with how someone did me wrong.
I guess my question is: Why isn't okay just to be where you are? I understand that we all have dreams and goals in life, but take some time to enjoy right where you are today.
So, in conclusion...I'm 31, single, yes, I have two cats - no, I'm not crazy, and all in all it's a pretty beautiful, amazing life.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Complete Thoughts....
I cannot believe the month of July has almost passed without one blog written. Really? How did that happen? When I went out to edit an old post, I realized that I had 7, yes SEVEN, partial blog entries sitting out there. Now, when have y'all known me not to have something to say? I had blogs on contentment, laugh lines, feeling funky - a whole range of thoughts and emotions and yet, not one finished blog entry.
So, here's an update...since I last blogged, I'm glad to say that both my pride and well other areas have recovered from the splinter. I will be honest enough to say that I was at the same house where the splinter incident took place just last Friday, and I didn't sit on the outside deck. Ha! One splinter - complete with the loss of my dignity - is enough for me. =)
I guess the biggest thing is that I have been house hunting. Now, let me tell you something that I'm sure you already know - the mantra for house hunting is "You don't know - unless you go". We have seen houses online that looked beautiful, only to get there and the entire kitchen be missing. No, really. We've seen great houses in not so great neighborhoods, crappy houses in wonderful neighborhoods, and a lot of houses in between. It's been very exciting to go looking. I am definitely taking my time in this process. Buying a house is a huge decision, and I want us to move in knowing we are going to be there for a long time...not move in looking for our next house.
Since the last time I blogged I've experienced credit card fraud, the check engine light came on in the car, I had to get glasses, written letters to troops, made my first ever homemade German chocolate cake, took a couple of days vacation, bought new sonic toothbrushes, celebrated 4th of July with fireworks, tears and a slaw dog, had dinner with an old friend from high school, made several new friends, spent countless hours discussing video games and various other things that 11 year old boys are interested in (man I love that kid), laughed so hard I instantly added to my laugh lines, and yeah, probably even cried once or twice (Dang that Toy Story 3 - that is what did it).
All in all...I'd say it's been a pretty typical month in the life of Kim. ha! So, there you go...I think I just summed up all of those 7 unfinished blog entries at once. That might just be the most amazing thing that has happened all month. =)
So, here's an update...since I last blogged, I'm glad to say that both my pride and well other areas have recovered from the splinter. I will be honest enough to say that I was at the same house where the splinter incident took place just last Friday, and I didn't sit on the outside deck. Ha! One splinter - complete with the loss of my dignity - is enough for me. =)
I guess the biggest thing is that I have been house hunting. Now, let me tell you something that I'm sure you already know - the mantra for house hunting is "You don't know - unless you go". We have seen houses online that looked beautiful, only to get there and the entire kitchen be missing. No, really. We've seen great houses in not so great neighborhoods, crappy houses in wonderful neighborhoods, and a lot of houses in between. It's been very exciting to go looking. I am definitely taking my time in this process. Buying a house is a huge decision, and I want us to move in knowing we are going to be there for a long time...not move in looking for our next house.
Since the last time I blogged I've experienced credit card fraud, the check engine light came on in the car, I had to get glasses, written letters to troops, made my first ever homemade German chocolate cake, took a couple of days vacation, bought new sonic toothbrushes, celebrated 4th of July with fireworks, tears and a slaw dog, had dinner with an old friend from high school, made several new friends, spent countless hours discussing video games and various other things that 11 year old boys are interested in (man I love that kid), laughed so hard I instantly added to my laugh lines, and yeah, probably even cried once or twice (Dang that Toy Story 3 - that is what did it).
All in all...I'd say it's been a pretty typical month in the life of Kim. ha! So, there you go...I think I just summed up all of those 7 unfinished blog entries at once. That might just be the most amazing thing that has happened all month. =)
Friday, June 18, 2010
Now That's Really Unfortunate...
As promised...here is the splinter story.
Sunday afternoon, our church had several cook-outs a different houses through out town. The deal is that you chose a cook-out to go to and then you maybe met new people from church. Great idea - by the way.
Anyways, I show up at this cook-out, homemade carrot cake in hand (it was so hot that the icing melted off my cake - but it was all gone, so they still liked it), and start making nice with people. I walk outside with my friend Sara and we decide on these built in wooden seats on the deck. Now, many people had been sitting on these before me, but wouldn't you know....
I sat down, looked at Sara and said "Um, either something just stung me through my jeans, or I currently have a splinter in my BEHIND!!!" Of course, I stand up, Sara looks - starts laughing - and pulls a three inch piece of wood out of my jeans. She's laughing, I'm laughing, but then I realize we have a problem. I look at her and say...."Um, Sara, that's great and all, but the wood broke off and I still have a splinter in my behind....right now....and it's not comfortable." Sweet Sara looks at me, laughs, and says "Now that's really unfortunate".
What do I do? I kind of sit on the other side and try not to further push the splinter in.
After the cook-out, my older sister Becky asks me to come down to her neighbor's house. Now, I say "neighbor" but the neighbors are all kind of like family. I explained about my splinter, but said I'd run by anyways. I show up at Pam's, and Becky is on it....she is sure my splinter is going to get infected - I absolutely HAVE to get the splinter out then. I was sure I could do it myself...Pam and Becky were not.
I should insert here and say that Becky has no problem changing clothes and stripping down in front of folks, but I'm not the same way.
Pam is a nurse, and they were not going to leave me alone until the splinter was removed. After about 20 minutes of listening to the both of them go on and on - I somehow ended up in Pam's bathroom, with Pam and Becky both trying to practice splinter removal techniques. Yeah, not one of my finer moments.
Pam then stated that I probably wasn't going to come to her house ever again - after ended up with them in the bathroom - I told her that she might get more people to come over if they knew that much fun was going on. ha!
So, the splinter is gone - along with my dignity, but hey - isn't that just like something that would happen to me?
Sunday afternoon, our church had several cook-outs a different houses through out town. The deal is that you chose a cook-out to go to and then you maybe met new people from church. Great idea - by the way.
Anyways, I show up at this cook-out, homemade carrot cake in hand (it was so hot that the icing melted off my cake - but it was all gone, so they still liked it), and start making nice with people. I walk outside with my friend Sara and we decide on these built in wooden seats on the deck. Now, many people had been sitting on these before me, but wouldn't you know....
I sat down, looked at Sara and said "Um, either something just stung me through my jeans, or I currently have a splinter in my BEHIND!!!" Of course, I stand up, Sara looks - starts laughing - and pulls a three inch piece of wood out of my jeans. She's laughing, I'm laughing, but then I realize we have a problem. I look at her and say...."Um, Sara, that's great and all, but the wood broke off and I still have a splinter in my behind....right now....and it's not comfortable." Sweet Sara looks at me, laughs, and says "Now that's really unfortunate".
What do I do? I kind of sit on the other side and try not to further push the splinter in.
After the cook-out, my older sister Becky asks me to come down to her neighbor's house. Now, I say "neighbor" but the neighbors are all kind of like family. I explained about my splinter, but said I'd run by anyways. I show up at Pam's, and Becky is on it....she is sure my splinter is going to get infected - I absolutely HAVE to get the splinter out then. I was sure I could do it myself...Pam and Becky were not.
I should insert here and say that Becky has no problem changing clothes and stripping down in front of folks, but I'm not the same way.
Pam is a nurse, and they were not going to leave me alone until the splinter was removed. After about 20 minutes of listening to the both of them go on and on - I somehow ended up in Pam's bathroom, with Pam and Becky both trying to practice splinter removal techniques. Yeah, not one of my finer moments.
Pam then stated that I probably wasn't going to come to her house ever again - after ended up with them in the bathroom - I told her that she might get more people to come over if they knew that much fun was going on. ha!
So, the splinter is gone - along with my dignity, but hey - isn't that just like something that would happen to me?
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Oh Goodness...It's Soap Box Time
It's no news that we have all been watching the oil spill and wondering what the end result is going to be for our community. However, lately, I've heard a few people compare the oil spill to 9-11. I was going to let it go, but I just can't. No, no I can't.
While I am not taking anything away from the 11 families that lost love ones - and it actually makes me sad that there was not more coverage on that fact - and I'm not taking away from the families that are going to be economically impacted for a long time from this, I think it is safe to say that the oil spill does not even begin to compare to 9-11.
The end result is that the oil spill was an industrial accident. A major failure and completely unacceptable, yes, but an accident all the same. I'm sorry, but this in no way compares to the loss of life of several thousand people on one day - not to mention the thousands that have gone to war since then - or the fact that an entire nation of people had their sense of security removed in an instant. BP is not waging jihad against the Gulf Coast. I don't lie awake in bed at night and wonder if they are planning a way to unleash tons of oil across other states.
I think that if you are making comparisons to the two, not only does it show your insensitivity to a very sensitive subject, but it also shows your complete ignorance. This is not about being a Democrat or Republican, but about being an American and remembering not only what we went through that day in September, but also what our men and women in the military have gone through since then.
So, I'm sorry...no, actually, I'm not. While the oil spill is definitely an economic and environmental disaster it in no way compares to 9-11.
While I am not taking anything away from the 11 families that lost love ones - and it actually makes me sad that there was not more coverage on that fact - and I'm not taking away from the families that are going to be economically impacted for a long time from this, I think it is safe to say that the oil spill does not even begin to compare to 9-11.
The end result is that the oil spill was an industrial accident. A major failure and completely unacceptable, yes, but an accident all the same. I'm sorry, but this in no way compares to the loss of life of several thousand people on one day - not to mention the thousands that have gone to war since then - or the fact that an entire nation of people had their sense of security removed in an instant. BP is not waging jihad against the Gulf Coast. I don't lie awake in bed at night and wonder if they are planning a way to unleash tons of oil across other states.
I think that if you are making comparisons to the two, not only does it show your insensitivity to a very sensitive subject, but it also shows your complete ignorance. This is not about being a Democrat or Republican, but about being an American and remembering not only what we went through that day in September, but also what our men and women in the military have gone through since then.
So, I'm sorry...no, actually, I'm not. While the oil spill is definitely an economic and environmental disaster it in no way compares to 9-11.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Come Next Monday...
I started a new blog to track my weight loss journey - ups and downs - good days, bad days, and downright ugly days. I plan on being completely honest - which means I might not be so nice some days, but maybe someone else will stumble upon it and realize that they are not the only ones going through the same thing. So many times you hear people talk about how good they feel losing weight and how nice it is - and yes, those things are true - but there are bad days, too. Days when you want to eat a gigantic burger or piece of cake and days when you might actually do that, too and then feel like crap afterwards. Well, I intend on documenting every step of the way.
The title of the blog is Come Next Monday.
I chose that name because it always seems that I am saying "come next Monday" I am starting a new diet, workout plans, whatever. Well, from now on....come next Monday.....I will be healthier me. Each Monday will be a healthy day, not one where I'm starting a new diet or workout program, but one where I know I am on the right track.
If y'all want to check it out, please feel free.
http://www.comenextmonday.blogspot.com/
Have a wonderful Sunday!
The title of the blog is Come Next Monday.
I chose that name because it always seems that I am saying "come next Monday" I am starting a new diet, workout plans, whatever. Well, from now on....come next Monday.....I will be healthier me. Each Monday will be a healthy day, not one where I'm starting a new diet or workout program, but one where I know I am on the right track.
If y'all want to check it out, please feel free.
http://www.comenextmonday.blogspot.com/
Have a wonderful Sunday!
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Random Smiles Part 2
The Grilling Season is upon us, so I thought I would remind everyone to practice safe grilling techniques. Here are two reasons why my son cringes every time he sees me head out the door with a lighter, charcoal, and lighter fluid....
1. Once upon a time, I was married, and in this marriage I cleaned house, raised a baby, took out the trash, and many other things, but one thing I did not do was fire up the grill. I guess the reason for that was because he liked to grill, and I liked to eat the grilled food, but was content with just making the sides.
One hot Summer day, Johnny's sister, Janna, came and picked JD up for a play date and I spontaneously asked if they would like to join us for dinner that night. What were we having? Well, hamburgers from the grill of course. Johnny wasn't going to be home until later, but I am a very productive woman and I can grill. I think. I've seen it done a ton of times.
The grill is on our back deck, so I walk outside, put the charcoal in and strike a match, but nothing happens. I go round up some lighter fluid. The only problem is that we don't have a full bottle, but several partial bottles. I decide that more is always better and proceed to drench the charcoal.
I lit the match, walked towards the grill, extend my arm and the match doesn't even make it to the grill before this huge ball of flames shoots up in the air, and burns what little hair I have on my arm off.
Now, I know we have all heard of "stop, drop, and roll", but that isn't what crossed my mind. I jumped, screamed, and sprinted off the deck - all the while yelling "THANK YOU, JESUS...OH THANK YOU, LORD. I'M NOT ON FIRE. I'M NOT ON FIRE". I was loud enough that the neighbors ran out and over to the house to see what was going on.
Johnny made me promise I would not use the grill again.
2. Fast forward several years. I am now divorced.
Summer is upon us and I realize that I am in charge of grilling my own food. I buy a tiny table top grill, put it together, and this time it comes with a bag of charcoal that already has lighter fluid in it. This cannot fail. Right? Right.
Usually, I get myself in trouble when I decide to deviate from the plan.
I put this little grill on my porch step, and try to light it, only it won't light because the wind is blowing too hard. So, I moved it to the side of the apartment, in the grass. I struck the match, put it in the bag of charcoal and then pick the grill up to move it back to the steps. I'm going to admit that at this point I did not have the sense that God gave a billy goat.
When I picked the dang grill up, the legs fell off of it. As I turned to corner, which it was only a couple of steps from where I was to where I wanted to be, the wind hit the bag and my little flame turned into a sure enough fire. A fire, in a grill that I am holding. Have y'all seen me? I'm only 5'1 which means I don't exactly have a long arm span.
The fire burns my arm, I drop the grill, and as luck would have it, the grill turned over causing the grass to catch on fire. At this point, I'm in a panic. What to do? What to do? Thankfully, JD was in the house, so he wasn't witnessing the fact that his mama was about to burn the place down.
About that time, these two Navy guys that lived next door arrive home, to see our grass on fire, and me in panic mode. The made quick work of putting out the small grass fire, the grill, and reassuring me that it was okay. Needless to say, I didn't grill out, but those boys got homemade lasagna, french bread, and a salad for dinner. And once again, my grilling spatula was hung up...
Our new tradition became that I would buy the steaks and shrimp and Scott, my best friend's husband, would do the grilling. For a while...
I am proud to say that a couple of years later, I bought a bigger grill, more charcoal, the Girls Guide to Grilling, came prepared with a little patience, and not so much lighter fluid, and I learned to grill. It was good. After all, everything tastes better on a charcoal grill.
Enjoy Summer. If you see a big plume of smoke from our direction, don't be too alarmed, I'm just back at the grill.
1. Once upon a time, I was married, and in this marriage I cleaned house, raised a baby, took out the trash, and many other things, but one thing I did not do was fire up the grill. I guess the reason for that was because he liked to grill, and I liked to eat the grilled food, but was content with just making the sides.
One hot Summer day, Johnny's sister, Janna, came and picked JD up for a play date and I spontaneously asked if they would like to join us for dinner that night. What were we having? Well, hamburgers from the grill of course. Johnny wasn't going to be home until later, but I am a very productive woman and I can grill. I think. I've seen it done a ton of times.
The grill is on our back deck, so I walk outside, put the charcoal in and strike a match, but nothing happens. I go round up some lighter fluid. The only problem is that we don't have a full bottle, but several partial bottles. I decide that more is always better and proceed to drench the charcoal.
I lit the match, walked towards the grill, extend my arm and the match doesn't even make it to the grill before this huge ball of flames shoots up in the air, and burns what little hair I have on my arm off.
Now, I know we have all heard of "stop, drop, and roll", but that isn't what crossed my mind. I jumped, screamed, and sprinted off the deck - all the while yelling "THANK YOU, JESUS...OH THANK YOU, LORD. I'M NOT ON FIRE. I'M NOT ON FIRE". I was loud enough that the neighbors ran out and over to the house to see what was going on.
Johnny made me promise I would not use the grill again.
2. Fast forward several years. I am now divorced.
Summer is upon us and I realize that I am in charge of grilling my own food. I buy a tiny table top grill, put it together, and this time it comes with a bag of charcoal that already has lighter fluid in it. This cannot fail. Right? Right.
Usually, I get myself in trouble when I decide to deviate from the plan.
I put this little grill on my porch step, and try to light it, only it won't light because the wind is blowing too hard. So, I moved it to the side of the apartment, in the grass. I struck the match, put it in the bag of charcoal and then pick the grill up to move it back to the steps. I'm going to admit that at this point I did not have the sense that God gave a billy goat.
When I picked the dang grill up, the legs fell off of it. As I turned to corner, which it was only a couple of steps from where I was to where I wanted to be, the wind hit the bag and my little flame turned into a sure enough fire. A fire, in a grill that I am holding. Have y'all seen me? I'm only 5'1 which means I don't exactly have a long arm span.
The fire burns my arm, I drop the grill, and as luck would have it, the grill turned over causing the grass to catch on fire. At this point, I'm in a panic. What to do? What to do? Thankfully, JD was in the house, so he wasn't witnessing the fact that his mama was about to burn the place down.
About that time, these two Navy guys that lived next door arrive home, to see our grass on fire, and me in panic mode. The made quick work of putting out the small grass fire, the grill, and reassuring me that it was okay. Needless to say, I didn't grill out, but those boys got homemade lasagna, french bread, and a salad for dinner. And once again, my grilling spatula was hung up...
Our new tradition became that I would buy the steaks and shrimp and Scott, my best friend's husband, would do the grilling. For a while...
I am proud to say that a couple of years later, I bought a bigger grill, more charcoal, the Girls Guide to Grilling, came prepared with a little patience, and not so much lighter fluid, and I learned to grill. It was good. After all, everything tastes better on a charcoal grill.
Enjoy Summer. If you see a big plume of smoke from our direction, don't be too alarmed, I'm just back at the grill.
Random Smiles...
Lately, it seems that people are asking me how such funny situations happen in my life. I've decided that really my life is no more or less funny than most, but that I see the humor in my situations. So, for your entertainment - here are a couple of funny stories...
1. How did I Nair the cat?
Well, technically, the cat Naired himself. No, really. JD was with his dad and I had some time to kill, so I decided to Nair my legs. After the Nair incident of 2001, I promised I wouldn't use that stuff again, but every now and then, I can't help it. Okay, I digress....
Anyways, I am lathering up my legs - and I mean I am putting a TON of this stuff on - when Crackers, the cat, comes into the bathroom. Now, don't take too long picturing this, but here I am, covered in Nair on my legs, Nair on my hands, and this goofy cat won't leave. Well, Crackers might be a gigantic cat, but he's also a scaredy cat. So, I make some kind of sudden movement and the cat runs off....but only after brushing the side of my leg and cover the side of his head in Nair.
What do I do? Freak out, of course. I jump up, wash my hands, grab a towel and the chase is on. Only now, Crackers really can't figure out why I'm running after him and he picks up the pace. It took several minutes for me to corner him. Then I realized I should have wet the towel. So, I'm still covered in Nair and I have to let the cat go so I can go wet the towel. The chase resumes. I finally catch him again, hold him down, and scrub his face and obviously a bit of his fur off, too. Poor cat.
See, some people would've been aggravated with that situation. Me? I really got a picture of what we must have looked like and I was cracking up.
2. What was the Nair incident of 2001?
I've also decided that women do all kinds of things in the name of beauty. I have shaved, waxed, Naired, and plucked all in the name of hair removal - and I'm not even a hairy person. I feel bad for the women who are hairy and feel the need to do these same things.
Back in 2001, I was a 22 year old, stay at home mom. One Wednesday, I decided to Nair my under arms. Seriously, don't ask why. So, I buy the quickest acting Nair I can find, come home, JD goes down for a nap and I decide to get it over with. Here is where things went wonky...
I lather up, read that you should keep the Nair on for 4-6 minutes, and then rinse. Only, I start thinking about how under arm hair surely must be more difficult to remove than leg hair, so I think it will take longer. I left it on for about 10 minutes....it started to burn. Did I mention that I really don't have a lot of hair anyways?
I jump in the shower and realized that I've managed to burn off the first layer of skin under both of my arms and y'all that was no joke. I called my husband and informed him that JD and I would not be going to church that night because there was no way I could put on deodorant.
Well, Johnny was so nice, and decided to bring home some Aloe Vera burn gel for me. His mom kept some in her fridge at all times. He comes home, and decides he will help me. I lift up both of my arms and on goes the gel.
I hit the floor in a hail of bad language and laughter through my tears. That crap wasn't made for chemical burns - it was made for SUN burns. Oh, the pain. He grabs a towel and tries to scrub it off. I'm pretty certain I said something like "NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!", as in slow-mo I see the abrasive towel coming for me.
It took many days for my under arms to heal up and I was pretty certain I would never Nair again - wax maybe - but not Nair.
1. How did I Nair the cat?
Well, technically, the cat Naired himself. No, really. JD was with his dad and I had some time to kill, so I decided to Nair my legs. After the Nair incident of 2001, I promised I wouldn't use that stuff again, but every now and then, I can't help it. Okay, I digress....
Anyways, I am lathering up my legs - and I mean I am putting a TON of this stuff on - when Crackers, the cat, comes into the bathroom. Now, don't take too long picturing this, but here I am, covered in Nair on my legs, Nair on my hands, and this goofy cat won't leave. Well, Crackers might be a gigantic cat, but he's also a scaredy cat. So, I make some kind of sudden movement and the cat runs off....but only after brushing the side of my leg and cover the side of his head in Nair.
What do I do? Freak out, of course. I jump up, wash my hands, grab a towel and the chase is on. Only now, Crackers really can't figure out why I'm running after him and he picks up the pace. It took several minutes for me to corner him. Then I realized I should have wet the towel. So, I'm still covered in Nair and I have to let the cat go so I can go wet the towel. The chase resumes. I finally catch him again, hold him down, and scrub his face and obviously a bit of his fur off, too. Poor cat.
See, some people would've been aggravated with that situation. Me? I really got a picture of what we must have looked like and I was cracking up.
2. What was the Nair incident of 2001?
I've also decided that women do all kinds of things in the name of beauty. I have shaved, waxed, Naired, and plucked all in the name of hair removal - and I'm not even a hairy person. I feel bad for the women who are hairy and feel the need to do these same things.
Back in 2001, I was a 22 year old, stay at home mom. One Wednesday, I decided to Nair my under arms. Seriously, don't ask why. So, I buy the quickest acting Nair I can find, come home, JD goes down for a nap and I decide to get it over with. Here is where things went wonky...
I lather up, read that you should keep the Nair on for 4-6 minutes, and then rinse. Only, I start thinking about how under arm hair surely must be more difficult to remove than leg hair, so I think it will take longer. I left it on for about 10 minutes....it started to burn. Did I mention that I really don't have a lot of hair anyways?
I jump in the shower and realized that I've managed to burn off the first layer of skin under both of my arms and y'all that was no joke. I called my husband and informed him that JD and I would not be going to church that night because there was no way I could put on deodorant.
Well, Johnny was so nice, and decided to bring home some Aloe Vera burn gel for me. His mom kept some in her fridge at all times. He comes home, and decides he will help me. I lift up both of my arms and on goes the gel.
I hit the floor in a hail of bad language and laughter through my tears. That crap wasn't made for chemical burns - it was made for SUN burns. Oh, the pain. He grabs a towel and tries to scrub it off. I'm pretty certain I said something like "NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!", as in slow-mo I see the abrasive towel coming for me.
It took many days for my under arms to heal up and I was pretty certain I would never Nair again - wax maybe - but not Nair.
Are You My Mother?
I found this note I had written on Facebook and wanted to save it to my blog.....this was originally posted February 21, 2009
First, let me start by saying that JD and I have had a fantastic day. We went out to the beach, played a little football (which would have been hilarious to witness, I'm sure), built an entire sand kingdom, went the the base, explored the forts, and went out to Pace. Now I'm hoping that we sleep like normal people tonight, or at least 6 hours would be nice.
Driving into Pace tonight JD was playing his Nintendo DS and I was listening to the radio and my thoughts began to wander. It takes about 45 minutes to get over there, so it is a bit of a drive. As I was driving over the bridge, Martina McBride's Independence Day came on and I was singing along, thinking of when Mae-Beth and I would sing that song at the top of our lungs. We would ride with the windows down and fly out of Pace into Pensacola like we weren't afraid of getting a ticket. If I would've known how closely that chorus would end up mirroring my life, I wonder if I would've sang so loudly and as carefree. I might would've thrown in the white towel and given up then...okay, probably not because that just isn't my style. =)
Since 90% of my friends on Facebook grew up with me, and the other 10% know enough about me to know this I don't mind sharing. For a long time it was not the easiest thing to go back to Pace. Not because of Pace itself, but because although that was where I grew up and had lived all my life, I no longer had a home there. It was strange to drive across the causeway, like 100's of times before, but know that even if I ended up back at the house that held so many memories, nobody there would even know who I was. The 6 acres where we played ball, red light green light, hide and seek, and so many other childhood games are now split into small plots of land for several houses and several families to raise their children. Honestly, I hope that the families raising their kids there will leave them with better memories than we have. I hope those are homes filled with love and peace.
For a long time I felt like the little bird in the childhood book "Are You My Mother?". I felt like I was searching for somewhere to call home - someone to go home to. People who knew all there was to know about me and still welcomed me in. Then, I dealt with those things and really had to take some time to heal. You know what I realized? I am home. I am me. All those things in my past are things that helped shape me into the person that I am today. And I like this person. It has not always been an easy journey and honestly, there are still some things that I don't talk about...not because I'm not healed from it, but because I am happy to say that those areas no longer consume me. It is what it is.
So, tonight I am thankful. Thankful for where my life has been and where I am today. Thankful that home doesn't have to be a house on 6 acres, but it truly is where your heart is. I could move back to Pace, go to Atlanta, Washington DC, Japan, yes...even New York City =), and I have a home.
And for those of you who might feel sad after reading this, please don't. I don't usually write about this kind of thing because I know it is not an easy subject, but it is not meant to be sad. It is meant to be a celebration of becoming the person I was always meant to be...completely whole, completely comfortable, completely happy...completely me. Complete in more ways than I ever thought possible.
First, let me start by saying that JD and I have had a fantastic day. We went out to the beach, played a little football (which would have been hilarious to witness, I'm sure), built an entire sand kingdom, went the the base, explored the forts, and went out to Pace. Now I'm hoping that we sleep like normal people tonight, or at least 6 hours would be nice.
Driving into Pace tonight JD was playing his Nintendo DS and I was listening to the radio and my thoughts began to wander. It takes about 45 minutes to get over there, so it is a bit of a drive. As I was driving over the bridge, Martina McBride's Independence Day came on and I was singing along, thinking of when Mae-Beth and I would sing that song at the top of our lungs. We would ride with the windows down and fly out of Pace into Pensacola like we weren't afraid of getting a ticket. If I would've known how closely that chorus would end up mirroring my life, I wonder if I would've sang so loudly and as carefree. I might would've thrown in the white towel and given up then...okay, probably not because that just isn't my style. =)
Since 90% of my friends on Facebook grew up with me, and the other 10% know enough about me to know this I don't mind sharing. For a long time it was not the easiest thing to go back to Pace. Not because of Pace itself, but because although that was where I grew up and had lived all my life, I no longer had a home there. It was strange to drive across the causeway, like 100's of times before, but know that even if I ended up back at the house that held so many memories, nobody there would even know who I was. The 6 acres where we played ball, red light green light, hide and seek, and so many other childhood games are now split into small plots of land for several houses and several families to raise their children. Honestly, I hope that the families raising their kids there will leave them with better memories than we have. I hope those are homes filled with love and peace.
For a long time I felt like the little bird in the childhood book "Are You My Mother?". I felt like I was searching for somewhere to call home - someone to go home to. People who knew all there was to know about me and still welcomed me in. Then, I dealt with those things and really had to take some time to heal. You know what I realized? I am home. I am me. All those things in my past are things that helped shape me into the person that I am today. And I like this person. It has not always been an easy journey and honestly, there are still some things that I don't talk about...not because I'm not healed from it, but because I am happy to say that those areas no longer consume me. It is what it is.
So, tonight I am thankful. Thankful for where my life has been and where I am today. Thankful that home doesn't have to be a house on 6 acres, but it truly is where your heart is. I could move back to Pace, go to Atlanta, Washington DC, Japan, yes...even New York City =), and I have a home.
And for those of you who might feel sad after reading this, please don't. I don't usually write about this kind of thing because I know it is not an easy subject, but it is not meant to be sad. It is meant to be a celebration of becoming the person I was always meant to be...completely whole, completely comfortable, completely happy...completely me. Complete in more ways than I ever thought possible.
Friday, June 4, 2010
Where Thousands Live...
"On Behalf of our elected City Council, those 10 masterful men who manage our magnificent municipality; and on behalf of the chairman of our county commision and his four commissioners who constantly deal with the changing, challenging conditions of our county; and on behalf of our wonderful people who populate the Northwest Florida area, it is my privilege and pleasure as mayor to welcome you to Pensacola, the western gate to the Sunshine State, where thousands live the way millions wish they could, where the warmth of our community comes not only from God's good sunshine, but from the hearts of the people who live here. Welcome to Pensacola, America's first place city and the place where America began." -Vince Whibbs
If you have lived in Pensacola any time at all, you have heard a portion of this speech before - I'm sure. I have often thought of this speech while anticipating a hurricane to hit our beaches, and lately it has been on my mind because of the oil spill.
I don't need to say it for you to know that Mayor Vince Whibbs summed up in a few short sentences why it is great to live in Pensacola. As we all know, that beauty comes with a price sometimes. I started thinking about all the hurricanes we have recovered from - Erin and Opal in August and October of 1995 and of course, Ivan in 2004 which rocked our world in a way we had not seen. After Ivan, please show me one person that did not have a blue roof or at least have a neighbor who had one. Those are just three major hurricanes, not to mention all the category 1 or tropical storms that have brought rain and wind to our shores.
We have faced financial insecurities - who can forget when the Base Realignment and Closure project was announced? Well, if you didn't live here then or were too young to remember - this was an unsettling time in our community and I know several people that were affected by the outcome.
How about every time we read in the paper about another one of our soldiers dying somewhere overseas, or even in a training flight over the mountains of Georgia, like so recently happened. And I am certain that all of us held our breath back in April of 2007 when word came in that Blue Angel #6 had crashed in South Carolina, hoped the outcome would not be what it was, and shed tears for Lieutenant Commander Kevin Davis and his family when we were told that he had been lost. I remember looking out my window the next day and watching the Blues fly back in, right over my apartment, looking for that plane that wasn't coming - and crying. You know why? Because even if those soldiers don't start out in Pensacola, they become one of us.
Which brings me to my point...
The past few weeks have been difficult for a lot of people. The uncertainty of the oil spill situation has been like tracking a hurricane for 40 days and still not knowing what the outcome is going to be. I don't pretend to know how this will impact our community or for how long this will impact our community, but I do know this:
At the end of the day, we will be there to clean up, to rebuild, to hold hands while we cry, to support each other, and one day...we will be at the beach, watching the Blues fly - thousands living the way millions wish they could.
If you have lived in Pensacola any time at all, you have heard a portion of this speech before - I'm sure. I have often thought of this speech while anticipating a hurricane to hit our beaches, and lately it has been on my mind because of the oil spill.
I don't need to say it for you to know that Mayor Vince Whibbs summed up in a few short sentences why it is great to live in Pensacola. As we all know, that beauty comes with a price sometimes. I started thinking about all the hurricanes we have recovered from - Erin and Opal in August and October of 1995 and of course, Ivan in 2004 which rocked our world in a way we had not seen. After Ivan, please show me one person that did not have a blue roof or at least have a neighbor who had one. Those are just three major hurricanes, not to mention all the category 1 or tropical storms that have brought rain and wind to our shores.
We have faced financial insecurities - who can forget when the Base Realignment and Closure project was announced? Well, if you didn't live here then or were too young to remember - this was an unsettling time in our community and I know several people that were affected by the outcome.
How about every time we read in the paper about another one of our soldiers dying somewhere overseas, or even in a training flight over the mountains of Georgia, like so recently happened. And I am certain that all of us held our breath back in April of 2007 when word came in that Blue Angel #6 had crashed in South Carolina, hoped the outcome would not be what it was, and shed tears for Lieutenant Commander Kevin Davis and his family when we were told that he had been lost. I remember looking out my window the next day and watching the Blues fly back in, right over my apartment, looking for that plane that wasn't coming - and crying. You know why? Because even if those soldiers don't start out in Pensacola, they become one of us.
Which brings me to my point...
The past few weeks have been difficult for a lot of people. The uncertainty of the oil spill situation has been like tracking a hurricane for 40 days and still not knowing what the outcome is going to be. I don't pretend to know how this will impact our community or for how long this will impact our community, but I do know this:
At the end of the day, we will be there to clean up, to rebuild, to hold hands while we cry, to support each other, and one day...we will be at the beach, watching the Blues fly - thousands living the way millions wish they could.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
I Finally Figured It Out!!!
I finally figured it out! I must be a princess. Oh, not a frog kissing princess or a princess that sings to animals in the woods (although, I've probably done that...ha!), but I must be the good ol' princess with the pea.
Why is that, you ask?
Simple - I haven't slept through the night in years - honestly, maybe never. ha! So, I'm thinking that maybe my problem is that there is a pea under my mattress and all I need to do is find it. Shoot, not only then will I be able to sleep, but all kinds of interesting things will happen.
Let's walk through some of the things I've done to get a full night's sleep:
I've bought new mattresses, upped my thread count on my sheets until I am now at 1000, bought a tempur-pedic mattress topper, drank warm milk, slept with the tv on, the light on, the tv off, the lights off, the pillows stacked, my head right on the mattress, the air turned down, the air turned up, I've even tried over the counter sleep aids (as encouraged by my doctor) they have the opposite effect on me - I end up WIRED for days, I've had a glass of wine before bed, I've turned the computer off, I've read the King James Version of the Bible, I've listened to music, I've listened to white noise - sometimes I've listened to the neighbors fight (ha!), I've counted sheep - no really, I've exercised before bed, I've done a whole routine of relaxation, I gave up watching Forensic Files and Criminal Minds before bed,.....I think you are getting the point.
The only theory I have left is the Princess and the Pea theory. That's got to be it, right? =)
I hope y'all have a great, sleep-filled night! If not, give me a call, I'm sure I'll be up.
Why is that, you ask?
Simple - I haven't slept through the night in years - honestly, maybe never. ha! So, I'm thinking that maybe my problem is that there is a pea under my mattress and all I need to do is find it. Shoot, not only then will I be able to sleep, but all kinds of interesting things will happen.
Let's walk through some of the things I've done to get a full night's sleep:
I've bought new mattresses, upped my thread count on my sheets until I am now at 1000, bought a tempur-pedic mattress topper, drank warm milk, slept with the tv on, the light on, the tv off, the lights off, the pillows stacked, my head right on the mattress, the air turned down, the air turned up, I've even tried over the counter sleep aids (as encouraged by my doctor) they have the opposite effect on me - I end up WIRED for days, I've had a glass of wine before bed, I've turned the computer off, I've read the King James Version of the Bible, I've listened to music, I've listened to white noise - sometimes I've listened to the neighbors fight (ha!), I've counted sheep - no really, I've exercised before bed, I've done a whole routine of relaxation, I gave up watching Forensic Files and Criminal Minds before bed,.....I think you are getting the point.
The only theory I have left is the Princess and the Pea theory. That's got to be it, right? =)
I hope y'all have a great, sleep-filled night! If not, give me a call, I'm sure I'll be up.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Blind - Dates Wipe-Outs #3
The end of 2009 rolled around and I'm certain that almost everyone I know had decided I'm going to be single forever. I've decided that most people want for you the kind of things that make them happy. If they are happy and married, they want the same for you. I'm not going to sit here and say that I don't think that would be nice, but I'm also not going to sit here and say that I lie around all the time bemoaning the fact that I'm single. I don't. That being said...
One night, in October - I got a phone call from my friends Veronica and Derek. They explain to me that they've met this great guy, told him about me, and we are going out on Friday night. Oh goodness. Here we go. They promise me that he seems normal. A nice guy, looking for friends. Sweet. I am great at making friends. It's one of my finer qualities. ha! I clarified that this was a blind date and V and Derek both said yes - but this time I was going to double date with them. This made me feel a bit better. The only thing was that he and my ex-husband share the same name. I kind of laughed, and said okay, no big deal.
We go to the bowling alley - and once again, he's late. Not 45 mins late, or an hour late, just a few minutes late, so no big deal. He really isn't bad looking. We start to bowl and he starts talking about his cat, even shows me pictures. Well, I have two cats - Cheese and Crackers - so this is cool with me. The he starts talking about how bad his back is and how he is sucking at bowling (he was kicking our behinds) and how he used to play in a league. Then he starts talking about how he wishes he hadn't got out of the military, he would be retiring in a few years (he was 37). By the end of the night, he had said that so much that V says "We know, you really shouldn't have gotten out of the military, you would be retired by now." Things aren't going horrible, but he really was kind of a down person.
We go to dinner, and the check comes. We shared pizza and I had ordered water. As soon as the check comes out, he says "Yeah, I really wish I made more money. I only make 31K a year, my rent is $500 a month, and I am living paycheck to paycheck." I am reaching for my purse to pay for my portion because I was feeling HORRIBLE!!! We were supposed to go for ice cream later and I told everyone the only way we could go to Baskin Robbins is if they allowed me to pay for everyone. I could not let this poor man pay for one more thing. We decide to go back to Veronica and Derek's and watch a movie. He talks more about how he needs friends...and by this time, I'm starting to feel a little worn out. I need to insert here that if a guy makes 31k a year and is happy in his job, then I am happy with that - I am not all materialistic. I would rather be with someone who was fulfilled in their career, than to be with someone who was absolutely miserable, but was doing it for the money. The thing that made me the most nervous was that this guy was a corrections officer and he told us how he knew just how far to go with the prisoners. I know his job is very stressful, but that kind of talk makes a person nervous.
He says he'll take me to my car - which was down the street at V's sister's house. We get to her house and he turns the car off. I am uncertain what to do. I have my mace ready. He looks at me and says he thinks we should talk a while. He proceeds to tell me that every girl he's ever been with has cheated on him and he doesn't feel comfortable with his women having male friends. Then he wanted to know why I kept my ex husbands last name and if I would change it back to my maiden name if someone I dated had a problem with it. I told him no. It was easier to keep the last name Franklin, it was JD's last name, and I wasn't bothered by it at all.
He then looks at me and says "Well, my biological clock is ticking, so I need to be with someone who can have kids". I almost died. I've heard that some women say that, but I didn't believe it and I've NEVER heard of a man saying that. If I have problems with fertility in the future - not that I am wishing it on myself by any means - I will swear that is because I felt my ovaries shrivel up right then at that moment. I was in shock.
He did end up calling me about a week later, I encouraged him to see a doctor. He said he felt like he should date 19-21 year old women and he knew that as a single mom I was waiting for someone to come "rescue" me from my situation. As nice as possible I explained to him that I was not waiting for someone to rescue me. I have been very blessed and I'm doing well with just me and JD. I explained that while I'm sure he was a nice man, that we wouldn't ever have a relationship and I really thought he needed to seek help for depression. He had told me that he had been in the bed with his cat, watching movies for four days.
At this time, I have renewed my vow to not go on blind dates. I wonder how long that will last. ha!
One night, in October - I got a phone call from my friends Veronica and Derek. They explain to me that they've met this great guy, told him about me, and we are going out on Friday night. Oh goodness. Here we go. They promise me that he seems normal. A nice guy, looking for friends. Sweet. I am great at making friends. It's one of my finer qualities. ha! I clarified that this was a blind date and V and Derek both said yes - but this time I was going to double date with them. This made me feel a bit better. The only thing was that he and my ex-husband share the same name. I kind of laughed, and said okay, no big deal.
We go to the bowling alley - and once again, he's late. Not 45 mins late, or an hour late, just a few minutes late, so no big deal. He really isn't bad looking. We start to bowl and he starts talking about his cat, even shows me pictures. Well, I have two cats - Cheese and Crackers - so this is cool with me. The he starts talking about how bad his back is and how he is sucking at bowling (he was kicking our behinds) and how he used to play in a league. Then he starts talking about how he wishes he hadn't got out of the military, he would be retiring in a few years (he was 37). By the end of the night, he had said that so much that V says "We know, you really shouldn't have gotten out of the military, you would be retired by now." Things aren't going horrible, but he really was kind of a down person.
We go to dinner, and the check comes. We shared pizza and I had ordered water. As soon as the check comes out, he says "Yeah, I really wish I made more money. I only make 31K a year, my rent is $500 a month, and I am living paycheck to paycheck." I am reaching for my purse to pay for my portion because I was feeling HORRIBLE!!! We were supposed to go for ice cream later and I told everyone the only way we could go to Baskin Robbins is if they allowed me to pay for everyone. I could not let this poor man pay for one more thing. We decide to go back to Veronica and Derek's and watch a movie. He talks more about how he needs friends...and by this time, I'm starting to feel a little worn out. I need to insert here that if a guy makes 31k a year and is happy in his job, then I am happy with that - I am not all materialistic. I would rather be with someone who was fulfilled in their career, than to be with someone who was absolutely miserable, but was doing it for the money. The thing that made me the most nervous was that this guy was a corrections officer and he told us how he knew just how far to go with the prisoners. I know his job is very stressful, but that kind of talk makes a person nervous.
He says he'll take me to my car - which was down the street at V's sister's house. We get to her house and he turns the car off. I am uncertain what to do. I have my mace ready. He looks at me and says he thinks we should talk a while. He proceeds to tell me that every girl he's ever been with has cheated on him and he doesn't feel comfortable with his women having male friends. Then he wanted to know why I kept my ex husbands last name and if I would change it back to my maiden name if someone I dated had a problem with it. I told him no. It was easier to keep the last name Franklin, it was JD's last name, and I wasn't bothered by it at all.
He then looks at me and says "Well, my biological clock is ticking, so I need to be with someone who can have kids". I almost died. I've heard that some women say that, but I didn't believe it and I've NEVER heard of a man saying that. If I have problems with fertility in the future - not that I am wishing it on myself by any means - I will swear that is because I felt my ovaries shrivel up right then at that moment. I was in shock.
He did end up calling me about a week later, I encouraged him to see a doctor. He said he felt like he should date 19-21 year old women and he knew that as a single mom I was waiting for someone to come "rescue" me from my situation. As nice as possible I explained to him that I was not waiting for someone to rescue me. I have been very blessed and I'm doing well with just me and JD. I explained that while I'm sure he was a nice man, that we wouldn't ever have a relationship and I really thought he needed to seek help for depression. He had told me that he had been in the bed with his cat, watching movies for four days.
At this time, I have renewed my vow to not go on blind dates. I wonder how long that will last. ha!
Blind Date - Wipe - Outs #2
Fast forward to almost exactly one year later. This time it was Laura's dad who was certain he had found the perfect guy for me. Hard working, single dad, cute little girl and Tom was sure he needed a great woman in his life -and that woman had to be me.
I had just gotten over my nightmares from my first blind date, and I really do love Tom and I know he really loves me, so I gave in. He tells me the guy's name and then explains that he has the same first and last name. I will call him Mark Mark. Obviously that is not his real name, but you get the point.
Having learned some lessons from the first blind date, I decided that we could meet at a location that he chose. He chose bowling. I'm a good sport. I suck at all things sports-like, but I have fun playing so it doesn't bother me to do things like that on a first date.
It was pouring down rain that day. I mean a deluge of water. I get to the bowling alley, slosh my way inside, and he's not there, yet. I called Tom. About an hour later, the guy shows up. Why can't people be on time? No, why? However, it was raining so I thought maybe he got hung up in the rain.
He brought his daughter along with him. Once again, that really was okay. I mean, he's a single dad after all. The only problem is that his daughter really didn't want him to date, so she proceeded to tell me that she was the only girl for her daddy and then threw herself on the floor. Oh goodness, I felt so bad for him. Really really bad. He calls his mom, and about 30 minutes later she came to pick his little girl up.
We start bowling and we are talking. He was very nice - I wasn't really feeling anything, but he was very nice. Then he says "I need to be honest about something". Uh oh. First he tells me that he has recently started smoking again. Okay. Then he says, "Well, the biggest thing is that I am really attracted to Filipino women. My daughter's mom was Filipino and I just love those women." Y'all I am completely okay with that. However, I'm about as far from Filipino as you can get with my blue eyes and bleached blond hair. ha!
He told me that even though Tom said I wasn't Filipino, he was hoping I would show up and have some Filipino in me. I said "Are you sure Tom didn't lead you to believe in any way that I was Filipino, because if he did I am so sorry." He says "Nope. He was honest - blond hair, big blue eyes, but I thought I'd see for myself." I smiled and said "I can honestly say that I don't believe I am even a little bit Filipino. We finished up our bowling and called it a day.
To this day, I'm still not Filipino. ha! However, Mae-Beth's Scott is, so I wonder if that would count now since he's going to be my brother-in-law. Probably not. =)
I once again swore off blind dates and once again kept my promise...for two years this time.
I had just gotten over my nightmares from my first blind date, and I really do love Tom and I know he really loves me, so I gave in. He tells me the guy's name and then explains that he has the same first and last name. I will call him Mark Mark. Obviously that is not his real name, but you get the point.
Having learned some lessons from the first blind date, I decided that we could meet at a location that he chose. He chose bowling. I'm a good sport. I suck at all things sports-like, but I have fun playing so it doesn't bother me to do things like that on a first date.
It was pouring down rain that day. I mean a deluge of water. I get to the bowling alley, slosh my way inside, and he's not there, yet. I called Tom. About an hour later, the guy shows up. Why can't people be on time? No, why? However, it was raining so I thought maybe he got hung up in the rain.
He brought his daughter along with him. Once again, that really was okay. I mean, he's a single dad after all. The only problem is that his daughter really didn't want him to date, so she proceeded to tell me that she was the only girl for her daddy and then threw herself on the floor. Oh goodness, I felt so bad for him. Really really bad. He calls his mom, and about 30 minutes later she came to pick his little girl up.
We start bowling and we are talking. He was very nice - I wasn't really feeling anything, but he was very nice. Then he says "I need to be honest about something". Uh oh. First he tells me that he has recently started smoking again. Okay. Then he says, "Well, the biggest thing is that I am really attracted to Filipino women. My daughter's mom was Filipino and I just love those women." Y'all I am completely okay with that. However, I'm about as far from Filipino as you can get with my blue eyes and bleached blond hair. ha!
He told me that even though Tom said I wasn't Filipino, he was hoping I would show up and have some Filipino in me. I said "Are you sure Tom didn't lead you to believe in any way that I was Filipino, because if he did I am so sorry." He says "Nope. He was honest - blond hair, big blue eyes, but I thought I'd see for myself." I smiled and said "I can honestly say that I don't believe I am even a little bit Filipino. We finished up our bowling and called it a day.
To this day, I'm still not Filipino. ha! However, Mae-Beth's Scott is, so I wonder if that would count now since he's going to be my brother-in-law. Probably not. =)
I once again swore off blind dates and once again kept my promise...for two years this time.
Blind Date - Wipe-Outs #1
Tonight, JD and I were watching the show Wipe-Out and it was the Blind Date edition. JD looks at me and tells me that maybe I should try this approach - after all, according to him, in the animated version of Spiderman it worked for Peter and Mary Jane. I kind of laughed and told him that I actually had been on a few blind dates and they would definitely be considered "wipe-outs". He was surprised to hear that I had been on blind dates - probably because I don't discuss dating with him - EVER. He's a kid, I'm his mom, some things you just don't need to share.
That being said, it did remind me of the three blind dates I've been on. Kind of like - three strikes you're out. Each time, I promised that I was not going out on another one, and somehow I ended up trying it again.
For your reading pleasure, I will tell about those three blind dates. Please know, I am sure that each gentleman is perfect for someone else, and I'm sure they could probably tell their own stories of the date, but this is my story.
Date #1:
This one happened about two years after I was divorced. I was 26, almost 27 and I had not dated much - okay at all - since the divorce. I had been busy being a mom, working two jobs at times, and pretty much was just tired. Well, my co-workers at the hospital thought that was not acceptable.
My supervisor came to me and said that her daughter had a friend. They worked together at the Sheriff's Department and they thought we would like to go out. Mistake #1 - feeling pressured by my boss to date her daughter's friend. She explained that he was 40, but was looking for a younger woman because he had a young daughter. I was very nervous, but my co-workers assured me that was because I hadn't dated. I figured if this guy was nice enough to ask, I needed to go. I'm not going to say his real name, because there is no telling who knows him, but let's just say he was named after an animal that you might hunt in the winter. They assured me that was his birth name.
So, he calls me on a Sunday night and ask me to dinner and a movie for the next night. Before I could even answer he says "I know you don't have your son tomorrow night, so there is no reason to turn me down." I told it would be fine to pick me up that next evening. He goes to hang up and I asked "Um, don't you need directions to my house?" He says "Nope, I already know where you live". At this point I was VERY nervous. Being as he was a Sheriff's Deputy, I would completely expect for him to look me up, but please be a little better at hiding it than that.
Monday evening, I will admit that I had a bad headache, but once again chalked it up to being nervous. He shows up - 45 minutes late and when I opened the door, I almost died. Here stood a man who had his shirt unbuttoned to about the 4th button, gold medallions around his neck, and gray chest hair all hanging out. Turns out he was 47. No big deal. I understand he might be nervous, so let's go give it the good old college try.
We get out to the car, I open the door for myself and realized that he had clothes, hangers, and various other items in the front passenger seat. I move those to the back and get in. My head is really hurting now. He tells me that he knows I enjoy action movies - which is true - so he's picked out the perfect movie. I must insert here that at this time, if it didn't come on the Disney Channel or CMT, I had not seen the previews for it. We ride over to the theatre and he purchases two tickets to a movie called Hostel. It was not an action flick. It was a horror movie.
I am a people watcher, so as we are waiting for the movie to start, I am watching the people coming in. He looks at me and says "Were you wanting some popcorn?" Me "No, I'm fine, thanks". He says, "Well, you are looking at those people like you want to steal their popcorn." I just smiled. I was speechless - and that was before the movie even began. I really WAS speechless after that. Really. I couldn't think of a word to say.
My head was now into full migraine mode. He offers to take me to Ruby Tuesday's for dinner. Which by this time, I was really at a loss as to what to say. Then he says "I thought maybe we could get an appetizer because I get indigestion this late at night". Y'all that is no joke. I just smiled. We go to dinner, he orders an appetizer for us to share and I excuse myself to the restroom. I was nearly in tears when I called my best friend, Laura, and explained to her that I really needed her to stay up until I called because she wasn't going to believe this.
I went back out to the table, determined to make small talk and finish the evening with a smile. Once again, I'm sure he was nervous, too. I sit down and he says "Well, I want you to tell me about your divorce." I was stunned. See, I don't really air my laundry in public - especially on a first date. So, I said "there really isn't much to tell". He says "No, really, tell me about it. I know all about how someone can ruin your life for the rest of your life." I just smiled and said "I really don't like to discuss my divorce and I don't feel the same way." He says "Of course you do. I'll be honest enough to say that my ex ruined my life and I'll never be the same." Thankfully, our waitress showed up about that time. She walks off and he says "My ex was a lazy stay at home mom and everyone knows stay at home moms only spend money and sit around all day. She gave me a daughter and I'll be honest, I love my daughter, but she got all of my ex-wife's worst qualities."
Okay, at this point, I was having a hard time biting my tongue. I kindly explained to him that I had been a stay at home mom for five and a half years and it was wonderful, but hard - and that I would go back to it in a heartbeat. I also explained that I love my son beyond words, and I'm pretty certain he got every good gene his dad and I have. Yeah, that pretty much ended the conversation.
So, we finally start to head back home, and he pops in a tape of Irish love songs and proceeds to sing to me. By this point, I honestly was looking for the candid camera. My co-workers had given me tips on how to let a guy know you are not interested and one of the ways was to go ahead and have your house keys ready. I had those out halfway through the movie. Okay, not really, but I definitely had them in my hand the closer to the house we got.
We pull up to the apartments, and he parked in the handicap parking spot. The signs had been blown down sometime before during hurricane Ivan and never replaced, so I wasn't sure he could see that he had parked in the wrong spot. So, me being the law abiding citizen I am said "Oh, I think you parked in the handicap parking spot." No joke, he looks right at me and says "I imagine I'll be gone before the police get here...oh wait - I am the police". At this point, inner Kim barfed. Picture a small animated inner Kim losing her shared appetizer all over the place. Yep, that's what I pictured.
Needless to say, he walked me to the door, and went in for the goodnight send off - to which I put my hand out in the classic stop sign, smiled and said "Well, you be real careful going home now - okay?" I opened my door - ran up my stairs - called my best friend and swore I would NEVER go on a blind date again.
The next day my co-worker informed me that she had found out the day before the last time he had been on a date, I was in the second grade. I did feel a little bit bad for him after that. I did make it clear though that I couldn't see him again.
I promised I wan't going on another blind date, and I didn't....for another year.
That being said, it did remind me of the three blind dates I've been on. Kind of like - three strikes you're out. Each time, I promised that I was not going out on another one, and somehow I ended up trying it again.
For your reading pleasure, I will tell about those three blind dates. Please know, I am sure that each gentleman is perfect for someone else, and I'm sure they could probably tell their own stories of the date, but this is my story.
Date #1:
This one happened about two years after I was divorced. I was 26, almost 27 and I had not dated much - okay at all - since the divorce. I had been busy being a mom, working two jobs at times, and pretty much was just tired. Well, my co-workers at the hospital thought that was not acceptable.
My supervisor came to me and said that her daughter had a friend. They worked together at the Sheriff's Department and they thought we would like to go out. Mistake #1 - feeling pressured by my boss to date her daughter's friend. She explained that he was 40, but was looking for a younger woman because he had a young daughter. I was very nervous, but my co-workers assured me that was because I hadn't dated. I figured if this guy was nice enough to ask, I needed to go. I'm not going to say his real name, because there is no telling who knows him, but let's just say he was named after an animal that you might hunt in the winter. They assured me that was his birth name.
So, he calls me on a Sunday night and ask me to dinner and a movie for the next night. Before I could even answer he says "I know you don't have your son tomorrow night, so there is no reason to turn me down." I told it would be fine to pick me up that next evening. He goes to hang up and I asked "Um, don't you need directions to my house?" He says "Nope, I already know where you live". At this point I was VERY nervous. Being as he was a Sheriff's Deputy, I would completely expect for him to look me up, but please be a little better at hiding it than that.
Monday evening, I will admit that I had a bad headache, but once again chalked it up to being nervous. He shows up - 45 minutes late and when I opened the door, I almost died. Here stood a man who had his shirt unbuttoned to about the 4th button, gold medallions around his neck, and gray chest hair all hanging out. Turns out he was 47. No big deal. I understand he might be nervous, so let's go give it the good old college try.
We get out to the car, I open the door for myself and realized that he had clothes, hangers, and various other items in the front passenger seat. I move those to the back and get in. My head is really hurting now. He tells me that he knows I enjoy action movies - which is true - so he's picked out the perfect movie. I must insert here that at this time, if it didn't come on the Disney Channel or CMT, I had not seen the previews for it. We ride over to the theatre and he purchases two tickets to a movie called Hostel. It was not an action flick. It was a horror movie.
I am a people watcher, so as we are waiting for the movie to start, I am watching the people coming in. He looks at me and says "Were you wanting some popcorn?" Me "No, I'm fine, thanks". He says, "Well, you are looking at those people like you want to steal their popcorn." I just smiled. I was speechless - and that was before the movie even began. I really WAS speechless after that. Really. I couldn't think of a word to say.
My head was now into full migraine mode. He offers to take me to Ruby Tuesday's for dinner. Which by this time, I was really at a loss as to what to say. Then he says "I thought maybe we could get an appetizer because I get indigestion this late at night". Y'all that is no joke. I just smiled. We go to dinner, he orders an appetizer for us to share and I excuse myself to the restroom. I was nearly in tears when I called my best friend, Laura, and explained to her that I really needed her to stay up until I called because she wasn't going to believe this.
I went back out to the table, determined to make small talk and finish the evening with a smile. Once again, I'm sure he was nervous, too. I sit down and he says "Well, I want you to tell me about your divorce." I was stunned. See, I don't really air my laundry in public - especially on a first date. So, I said "there really isn't much to tell". He says "No, really, tell me about it. I know all about how someone can ruin your life for the rest of your life." I just smiled and said "I really don't like to discuss my divorce and I don't feel the same way." He says "Of course you do. I'll be honest enough to say that my ex ruined my life and I'll never be the same." Thankfully, our waitress showed up about that time. She walks off and he says "My ex was a lazy stay at home mom and everyone knows stay at home moms only spend money and sit around all day. She gave me a daughter and I'll be honest, I love my daughter, but she got all of my ex-wife's worst qualities."
Okay, at this point, I was having a hard time biting my tongue. I kindly explained to him that I had been a stay at home mom for five and a half years and it was wonderful, but hard - and that I would go back to it in a heartbeat. I also explained that I love my son beyond words, and I'm pretty certain he got every good gene his dad and I have. Yeah, that pretty much ended the conversation.
So, we finally start to head back home, and he pops in a tape of Irish love songs and proceeds to sing to me. By this point, I honestly was looking for the candid camera. My co-workers had given me tips on how to let a guy know you are not interested and one of the ways was to go ahead and have your house keys ready. I had those out halfway through the movie. Okay, not really, but I definitely had them in my hand the closer to the house we got.
We pull up to the apartments, and he parked in the handicap parking spot. The signs had been blown down sometime before during hurricane Ivan and never replaced, so I wasn't sure he could see that he had parked in the wrong spot. So, me being the law abiding citizen I am said "Oh, I think you parked in the handicap parking spot." No joke, he looks right at me and says "I imagine I'll be gone before the police get here...oh wait - I am the police". At this point, inner Kim barfed. Picture a small animated inner Kim losing her shared appetizer all over the place. Yep, that's what I pictured.
Needless to say, he walked me to the door, and went in for the goodnight send off - to which I put my hand out in the classic stop sign, smiled and said "Well, you be real careful going home now - okay?" I opened my door - ran up my stairs - called my best friend and swore I would NEVER go on a blind date again.
The next day my co-worker informed me that she had found out the day before the last time he had been on a date, I was in the second grade. I did feel a little bit bad for him after that. I did make it clear though that I couldn't see him again.
I promised I wan't going on another blind date, and I didn't....for another year.
Monday, May 31, 2010
The 75 Degree Challenge
It's no secret that I LOVE to keep my air turned down to 65 or below at night. Since I do not have a programmable thermostat, that means I've also kept the air that low for the whole day sometimes because I can forget to turn it up. As you can imagine, in the winter my power bills are low and in the summer - yeah, not so much. =)
So, I have decided to keep my air at 75 all day and all night - no touchy - for a whole month. I've made it a week now, and it hasn't been that bad. I mean, once again, this is the girl who grew up without central heat or air, so this really shouldn't be so hard. I want to see what the difference in my kwh is on my next bill. Does it make a difference to keep it at 75 all day, or is it about the same as 65 at night and 78 during the day? We shall see.
Needless to say, I had to buy JD new pj's. He's used to wearing long sleeved pajamas all year long. I bought him several new pairs, and he said he was comfortable the whole night. Today was my first day at the house the entire day and it wasn't bad at all. When you think about the fact that we had days in the 90's last week, 75 is still pretty cool.
I'll post back when the month is up.
So, I have decided to keep my air at 75 all day and all night - no touchy - for a whole month. I've made it a week now, and it hasn't been that bad. I mean, once again, this is the girl who grew up without central heat or air, so this really shouldn't be so hard. I want to see what the difference in my kwh is on my next bill. Does it make a difference to keep it at 75 all day, or is it about the same as 65 at night and 78 during the day? We shall see.
Needless to say, I had to buy JD new pj's. He's used to wearing long sleeved pajamas all year long. I bought him several new pairs, and he said he was comfortable the whole night. Today was my first day at the house the entire day and it wasn't bad at all. When you think about the fact that we had days in the 90's last week, 75 is still pretty cool.
I'll post back when the month is up.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Tips, Please!
I keep getting these $15 off $15 coupons in the mail and I try to use them - after all, that is like throwing money away. What I do is go to the clearance section, find one or two things on clearance and then use my coupon. Usually, I end up spending about $2 and walk away with clothes that were once priced at $80 or more. Obviously, the more money you spend they give you a great discount, but it's become a game to me to go in and only use the $15 off $15. Anyways, that is not my story...that just got me to the mall. =)
Before I even went to the mall today, I was craving a pretzel. I cannot even remember the last time I had a pretzel, but I'm certain it's been a couple of years - at least. Now, I'm not supposed to have pretzels on P90X, and I'll admit that, but I'm battling my hormones today and obviously losing. ha! So I walk down to Pretzel Time order a small order of pretzel bites and a drink. I pay the girl, and I'm fumbling to get napkins as she walks away. There are three workers present - one sitting on a chair, one just took care of a customer, and the girl who took my order.
As I'm trying to get napkins out of the dispenser, the girl in the chair looks up and says:
"I don't know what the deal is with these people!!! How many tips did y'all get yesterday?"
One girl responds back "Not much, obviously people are cheap."
The girl who waited on me, kind of glances back at me and says "I just waited on that lady and I didn't get tipped anything."
Chair girls says "Wow! Un-freaking-believable".
At this point I did look around for a tip jar, but didn't see one at the register I was at, so I took my napkins and walked away. Who knew you were supposed to tip at the pretzel stand? I certainly didn't. I felt a little bad, but I will be honest to say that I also felt a little like telling those three girls they needed to get up, quit complaining - "If you've got time to lean, you've got time to clean" and realize they work at a pretzel stand - not a sit down restaurant.
At this point I feel the need to defend myself and say I am known as the queen of the over tippers. Yes, I tip in the drive-thru if there is a place for it. Yes, I tip the pizza guy - even if a fee has already been charged. Subway has started asking for tips, and I tip at Subway. If there is a tip jar, I'm going to try and put something in. I was like that before I waitressed, but will admit to being even worse after having waitressed for a living. I can get horrible service and still tip 20% because I realize the server might be having a rough day and they still need to pay their bills. However, I am so confused on when I should and should not tip now. It's like every place you go people are asking for tips. I certainly don't mind paying it, but when I worked at McDonald's in high school, we never go tips. We would've been fired for accepting tips.
So, I guess that is my question. Who gets tipped? Y'all should have been there the time I first realized I was supposed to tip the person who did my hair. Oh wow....I felt horrible. No one ever mentioned I was to tip - I thought they got paid to do my hair and that was all I needed to pay. Any suggestions?
Needless to say, I won't be going to Pretzel Time again anytime soon.
Before I even went to the mall today, I was craving a pretzel. I cannot even remember the last time I had a pretzel, but I'm certain it's been a couple of years - at least. Now, I'm not supposed to have pretzels on P90X, and I'll admit that, but I'm battling my hormones today and obviously losing. ha! So I walk down to Pretzel Time order a small order of pretzel bites and a drink. I pay the girl, and I'm fumbling to get napkins as she walks away. There are three workers present - one sitting on a chair, one just took care of a customer, and the girl who took my order.
As I'm trying to get napkins out of the dispenser, the girl in the chair looks up and says:
"I don't know what the deal is with these people!!! How many tips did y'all get yesterday?"
One girl responds back "Not much, obviously people are cheap."
The girl who waited on me, kind of glances back at me and says "I just waited on that lady and I didn't get tipped anything."
Chair girls says "Wow! Un-freaking-believable".
At this point I did look around for a tip jar, but didn't see one at the register I was at, so I took my napkins and walked away. Who knew you were supposed to tip at the pretzel stand? I certainly didn't. I felt a little bad, but I will be honest to say that I also felt a little like telling those three girls they needed to get up, quit complaining - "If you've got time to lean, you've got time to clean" and realize they work at a pretzel stand - not a sit down restaurant.
At this point I feel the need to defend myself and say I am known as the queen of the over tippers. Yes, I tip in the drive-thru if there is a place for it. Yes, I tip the pizza guy - even if a fee has already been charged. Subway has started asking for tips, and I tip at Subway. If there is a tip jar, I'm going to try and put something in. I was like that before I waitressed, but will admit to being even worse after having waitressed for a living. I can get horrible service and still tip 20% because I realize the server might be having a rough day and they still need to pay their bills. However, I am so confused on when I should and should not tip now. It's like every place you go people are asking for tips. I certainly don't mind paying it, but when I worked at McDonald's in high school, we never go tips. We would've been fired for accepting tips.
So, I guess that is my question. Who gets tipped? Y'all should have been there the time I first realized I was supposed to tip the person who did my hair. Oh wow....I felt horrible. No one ever mentioned I was to tip - I thought they got paid to do my hair and that was all I needed to pay. Any suggestions?
Needless to say, I won't be going to Pretzel Time again anytime soon.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
I Have The Freedom To Stink
Originally Posted January 17, 2009
Yesterday I left work sick. My throat had started hurting and I was very achy and decided that I could be miserable at home instead of at work...that is why we have sick leave. =) So, I left work, went to Wal-Mart to get some medicine, came home and put on my pajamas. My ex-mother in law dropped JD off when he got out of school. Which, was very nice because I didn't have to leave to go get him. I took some liquid Tylenol medicine, drank a large coffee cup of hot water, lemon, and honey and proceeded to fall asleep on the couch.
Needless to say, JD pretty much had a free for all night. He got to eat frozen pizza, play Nintendo for hours, and sleep on the couch. For a kid, that is a great time. I was hurting for real by 8, so I went and got in the bed. Now, if y'all didn't know, I keep my house at about 65-67 degrees all the time. JD wears winter pj's in the summer. In the summer, the power company loves me...in the winter, not so much. Well, last night, I had my heat turned up to 75, my long sleeve, long pant pj's on, and my heating pad plugged in. Oh yeah....nice. JD was in his underwear...once again, thinking that was cool. =) I slept off and on and at midnight wake up to hear the tv still on in the living room. I didn't even have the energy to do anything about it. I woke up about 1 and it was off, so he was asleep by then. I woke up for good about 5:00. I laid in bed until 6:15 when my best friend called to check on me. She is a nurse and was on her way to work. JD gets up and is back to his Nintendo marathon.
Anyways, JD was going back to his dad's this morning, so I told him he needed to go get a shower. No joke...my kid looks at me and says "I have the freedom to stink...I'm pretty certain it is on of the amendments." Huh? I just started laughing. This is the kid who takes showers longer than a teenage girl. He was just being funny. I told him I think he was mistaken and he says "Have you read all the amendments to the Constitution? I pretty certain it is around #100." I responded back with "I'm pretty certain the only freedom you get is what your mom gives you, so you better amend yourself to the shower." He laughed and agreed that in this house, mom is the law. Man, I love being a mom. Someone on this planet has to listen to me! Ah, the power. hehehehehe
I still pretty much feel like crap, but maybe a tad less like crap than last night. I've taken up residence on the couch with my diet ginger ale, Tylenol, and cough drops.
Yesterday I left work sick. My throat had started hurting and I was very achy and decided that I could be miserable at home instead of at work...that is why we have sick leave. =) So, I left work, went to Wal-Mart to get some medicine, came home and put on my pajamas. My ex-mother in law dropped JD off when he got out of school. Which, was very nice because I didn't have to leave to go get him. I took some liquid Tylenol medicine, drank a large coffee cup of hot water, lemon, and honey and proceeded to fall asleep on the couch.
Needless to say, JD pretty much had a free for all night. He got to eat frozen pizza, play Nintendo for hours, and sleep on the couch. For a kid, that is a great time. I was hurting for real by 8, so I went and got in the bed. Now, if y'all didn't know, I keep my house at about 65-67 degrees all the time. JD wears winter pj's in the summer. In the summer, the power company loves me...in the winter, not so much. Well, last night, I had my heat turned up to 75, my long sleeve, long pant pj's on, and my heating pad plugged in. Oh yeah....nice. JD was in his underwear...once again, thinking that was cool. =) I slept off and on and at midnight wake up to hear the tv still on in the living room. I didn't even have the energy to do anything about it. I woke up about 1 and it was off, so he was asleep by then. I woke up for good about 5:00. I laid in bed until 6:15 when my best friend called to check on me. She is a nurse and was on her way to work. JD gets up and is back to his Nintendo marathon.
Anyways, JD was going back to his dad's this morning, so I told him he needed to go get a shower. No joke...my kid looks at me and says "I have the freedom to stink...I'm pretty certain it is on of the amendments." Huh? I just started laughing. This is the kid who takes showers longer than a teenage girl. He was just being funny. I told him I think he was mistaken and he says "Have you read all the amendments to the Constitution? I pretty certain it is around #100." I responded back with "I'm pretty certain the only freedom you get is what your mom gives you, so you better amend yourself to the shower." He laughed and agreed that in this house, mom is the law. Man, I love being a mom. Someone on this planet has to listen to me! Ah, the power. hehehehehe
I still pretty much feel like crap, but maybe a tad less like crap than last night. I've taken up residence on the couch with my diet ginger ale, Tylenol, and cough drops.
Two For One Special...
Originally Posted November 16, 2008
I have two thoughts on my mind, so I thought I'd just blog about both.
First, last night I went to the night air show out at the base. Most of you know that something about Patriotic music and fireworks combine to make me cry. It's odd, but true. I cry every time. Anyways, sure enough, they kicked off the fireworks and suddenly a thought hit me... I suddenly thought about how here I was sitting out at the base, watching the show, while half a world away there were guys and girls protecting me; doing something for me that I hadn't even done for myself. I realize that I am a very Patriotic person. I love this country, and I am very proud to live here. I also have great respect and admiration for our military men - who are willing to leave their families to protect mine. As I looked around last night I saw several young Navy guys in their white uniforms. I don't know the technical name for them, but if you live in this town you know the ones I mean - the uniform that screams "I'm a newbie!". As I looked at the guys, who I would consider babies on a regular day, I was struck by such a sense of overwhelming thankfulness for their sense of duty to this country. These young guys, who don't even look old enough to drive, much less go to war, have willingly decided to sign up for the military.
I also said a quick prayer for all of their mamas. As a mom, your thoughts are turned towards protecting your child from everything. I imagine I would feel great pride, yet great trepidation, if my son came home and said he wanted to go. So, last night, those unknown women were on my heart.
In closing on this subject, I just want to say a great big THANK YOU to all of my friends who have served! Thank you for helping make this country what it is. Let's all remember those who have sacrificed for us!
"It is the soldier, not the reporter, who has given us the freedom of the press.
It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech.
It is the soldier, not the campus organizer, who gives us the freedom to demonstrate.
It is the soldier who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the flag."
—Father Dennis Edward O'Brien, Sergeant, USMarineCorps
That poem says it all.
On a different note...HOT CHOCOLATE SEASON HAS ARRIVED!!!
For those of you who don't know - JD and I have "hot chocolate season". Basically, this season runs from the time we put up our decorations until New Year's and we are allowed to have one cup of hot chocolate - with milk - and whip cream - everyday. It might not sound like a big deal to y'all, but it is a tradition at our house. It is just something silly that we do. Anyways, today we decorated.
And before you start - yes, it is before Thanksgiving. Got it. I know perfectly well what the date is. As a matter of fact, I've been planning for a month that this would be our day to decorate. Since we are going out of town, it is better to go ahead and decorate so we can enjoy it. Heck, even if we weren't going out of town we still decorate early.
We added some new things. I now have large, sparkly blue and silver snowflakes suspended from the ceiling. I was about a foot too short for the job, so I spent a lot of time standing in a chair on my tip toes this evening. Nice calf workout. Although, if you could have seen me juggling fishing line, snowflakes, and a hammer while on my tip toes, you probably would've laughed. We also bought another Christmas blanket - which we definitely didn't need - and more candles - which we definitely DEFINITELY didn't need. =) You know what though? We love it!!! We are now sitting here with the tree on, the candles burning, and only one other light on. It is so relaxing. If I had a fireplace, we'd have a fire. ahhhhh
Anyways, I'm going to go. It is time to clean our new Christmas coffee mugs (we get to pick out new ones each year) and make our first cup of hot chocolate. JD picked out the cup shaped like a penguin, and mine is shaped like a snowman. It is time to snuggle down!!!
This is a beautiful - and I mean absolutely amazingly beautiful life!!
I have two thoughts on my mind, so I thought I'd just blog about both.
First, last night I went to the night air show out at the base. Most of you know that something about Patriotic music and fireworks combine to make me cry. It's odd, but true. I cry every time. Anyways, sure enough, they kicked off the fireworks and suddenly a thought hit me... I suddenly thought about how here I was sitting out at the base, watching the show, while half a world away there were guys and girls protecting me; doing something for me that I hadn't even done for myself. I realize that I am a very Patriotic person. I love this country, and I am very proud to live here. I also have great respect and admiration for our military men - who are willing to leave their families to protect mine. As I looked around last night I saw several young Navy guys in their white uniforms. I don't know the technical name for them, but if you live in this town you know the ones I mean - the uniform that screams "I'm a newbie!". As I looked at the guys, who I would consider babies on a regular day, I was struck by such a sense of overwhelming thankfulness for their sense of duty to this country. These young guys, who don't even look old enough to drive, much less go to war, have willingly decided to sign up for the military.
I also said a quick prayer for all of their mamas. As a mom, your thoughts are turned towards protecting your child from everything. I imagine I would feel great pride, yet great trepidation, if my son came home and said he wanted to go. So, last night, those unknown women were on my heart.
In closing on this subject, I just want to say a great big THANK YOU to all of my friends who have served! Thank you for helping make this country what it is. Let's all remember those who have sacrificed for us!
"It is the soldier, not the reporter, who has given us the freedom of the press.
It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech.
It is the soldier, not the campus organizer, who gives us the freedom to demonstrate.
It is the soldier who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the flag."
—Father Dennis Edward O'Brien, Sergeant, USMarineCorps
That poem says it all.
On a different note...HOT CHOCOLATE SEASON HAS ARRIVED!!!
For those of you who don't know - JD and I have "hot chocolate season". Basically, this season runs from the time we put up our decorations until New Year's and we are allowed to have one cup of hot chocolate - with milk - and whip cream - everyday. It might not sound like a big deal to y'all, but it is a tradition at our house. It is just something silly that we do. Anyways, today we decorated.
And before you start - yes, it is before Thanksgiving. Got it. I know perfectly well what the date is. As a matter of fact, I've been planning for a month that this would be our day to decorate. Since we are going out of town, it is better to go ahead and decorate so we can enjoy it. Heck, even if we weren't going out of town we still decorate early.
We added some new things. I now have large, sparkly blue and silver snowflakes suspended from the ceiling. I was about a foot too short for the job, so I spent a lot of time standing in a chair on my tip toes this evening. Nice calf workout. Although, if you could have seen me juggling fishing line, snowflakes, and a hammer while on my tip toes, you probably would've laughed. We also bought another Christmas blanket - which we definitely didn't need - and more candles - which we definitely DEFINITELY didn't need. =) You know what though? We love it!!! We are now sitting here with the tree on, the candles burning, and only one other light on. It is so relaxing. If I had a fireplace, we'd have a fire. ahhhhh
Anyways, I'm going to go. It is time to clean our new Christmas coffee mugs (we get to pick out new ones each year) and make our first cup of hot chocolate. JD picked out the cup shaped like a penguin, and mine is shaped like a snowman. It is time to snuggle down!!!
This is a beautiful - and I mean absolutely amazingly beautiful life!!
Lace Up Your Shoes And Start Running...Faster Now
Originally Posted October 20, 2008
Okay, so I know I tend to blog a lot about the same things...however, it is just me. Maybe that means God is trying to tell me something and apparently He feels the need to retell me over and over because I'm a little thick headed. In turn, I share it with y'all.
Tonight, I decided to run down the road for something...not literally, but in the car. It was right before the sun was starting to set, and as I headed out I couldn't help but notice just how beautiful it was outside. It just felt clean. I ran my errand, and headed back west - right into the beautiful sunset. I felt like I could drive forever - and just watch the sun go down. It was a sky filled with colors that really have no names...hard to describe because words like, pink, orange, red, with a hint of blue, just don't seem to describe the majestic painting that was there for all to see. Once again...Fall is here.
This is my probably my favorite time of year to run. The air feels clean and crisp, and after months of feeling like you are breathing under water with all the humidity, you really appreciate the change. It's like one day it is 97 degrees with 98% humidity, and the next it is a nice 80 without humidity.
On my drive tonight I once again began to think about how we are all running. We are either running from something or to something, and sometimes we are doing both.
Sometimes we lace up our shoes and just start running trying to outrun ourselves, or someone else, and we have no destination in mind - just running to get away. We run until we can't breathe, until our legs are jelly, until there is no thought but just putting one foot in front of the other and moving. We run so that we don't have to think. We get up, go to work, go through the motions, compartmentalize, run home, do all of our errands, and run until exhausted, we fall asleep - or not. Even then, we are running to something. However, because we are running blindly, we are not creating our destiny, but desperately just trying to stay out of the pot holes, briers, or ditches that come up. We have our heads down, blinders on, and just can't seem to stop for fear that the stray dog that is chasing us just might catch up. We know that if we stop, we are through. We are running out of desperation.
Then there are the times when we lace up, map out our plan, strap on the iPod, drink some water, open the door to a new day, and begin a run that will put us on the path to fulfilling God's greatness in our life. We say a prayer, we put our faith in Him, and we set out. We start at a nice jog, breathe in the fresh clean air, feel our muscles start to kick in, and realize that this will be a fantastic run. We look at the obstacles around us - the pot holes, briers, ditches, stray dogs - and see them for what they really are - just a test for our strength. We look around and see the wondrous mercies that have been afforded us. We take in the scenery. We pick up the pace, wave to the neighbors, run with our head held high, run until our legs start to feel stronger, until our lungs are filled with praise, until our heart starts to beat with His. We run until we realize that while we might have mapped out a plan, He has a greater one. He has a plan that might not lead us where we thought - as a matter of fact, it probably won't - yet, we look around and can see that you are right where you are supposed to be. We are running out of praise, out of love, out of thankfulness, out of excitement for the future.
I have been in both pairs of shoes...on both paths. I ran out of desperation. I ran until I realized that unless I am running out of love, I'm not going to be able to complete the course. I ran until, exhausted, I finally decided that nothing, not even the pot holes, briers, and dogs, could be worse than that feeling. Nothing could be worse than always trying to run faster - and not being able to outrun the true reason I felt couldn't stop - because no matter how fast I ran, I couldn't outrun myself. I woke up and realized that I was so tangled up in everything, that I was really running in place, like on a treadmill, and it would never end. I took off the blinders, looked around, and promptly broke down.
Then thankfully, I began to run again. I began to move in a new way, with new thoughts, with new beginnings. I stepped off the treadmill, and hit the road. I gave it over, and now I no longer run alone. I always have Him there to guide me. I have Him to run ahead, check out the path, and tell me how to proceed. Now, do I always go with the plan? I would like to say, yes, however, sometimes I forget that I don't have to do it on my own. You know what, though? As soon as I come back to my senses, He is still there waiting. Always waiting for me. Always reminding me that the path ahead will lead to good things. Always telling me that even when it's raining, when the mosquitoes are out, when the sun is so hot it is almost like the pavement is melting, when the path is bumpy, He is right there.
So, tonight, I am thankful. I'm thankful for this beautiful weather, thankful for this beautiful life. I am most thankful for His plan for my life. I am ready to put on my running shoes and continue to run into my destiny. The one that is created just for me - not out of desperation, but out of love. I am thankful that I don't have to do it on my own, because truly I am not that strong.
I hope y'all have a wonderful night! I am so looking forward to literally putting on my running shoes tomorrow, and taking it outside! Woo hoo!
Okay, so I know I tend to blog a lot about the same things...however, it is just me. Maybe that means God is trying to tell me something and apparently He feels the need to retell me over and over because I'm a little thick headed. In turn, I share it with y'all.
Tonight, I decided to run down the road for something...not literally, but in the car. It was right before the sun was starting to set, and as I headed out I couldn't help but notice just how beautiful it was outside. It just felt clean. I ran my errand, and headed back west - right into the beautiful sunset. I felt like I could drive forever - and just watch the sun go down. It was a sky filled with colors that really have no names...hard to describe because words like, pink, orange, red, with a hint of blue, just don't seem to describe the majestic painting that was there for all to see. Once again...Fall is here.
This is my probably my favorite time of year to run. The air feels clean and crisp, and after months of feeling like you are breathing under water with all the humidity, you really appreciate the change. It's like one day it is 97 degrees with 98% humidity, and the next it is a nice 80 without humidity.
On my drive tonight I once again began to think about how we are all running. We are either running from something or to something, and sometimes we are doing both.
Sometimes we lace up our shoes and just start running trying to outrun ourselves, or someone else, and we have no destination in mind - just running to get away. We run until we can't breathe, until our legs are jelly, until there is no thought but just putting one foot in front of the other and moving. We run so that we don't have to think. We get up, go to work, go through the motions, compartmentalize, run home, do all of our errands, and run until exhausted, we fall asleep - or not. Even then, we are running to something. However, because we are running blindly, we are not creating our destiny, but desperately just trying to stay out of the pot holes, briers, or ditches that come up. We have our heads down, blinders on, and just can't seem to stop for fear that the stray dog that is chasing us just might catch up. We know that if we stop, we are through. We are running out of desperation.
Then there are the times when we lace up, map out our plan, strap on the iPod, drink some water, open the door to a new day, and begin a run that will put us on the path to fulfilling God's greatness in our life. We say a prayer, we put our faith in Him, and we set out. We start at a nice jog, breathe in the fresh clean air, feel our muscles start to kick in, and realize that this will be a fantastic run. We look at the obstacles around us - the pot holes, briers, ditches, stray dogs - and see them for what they really are - just a test for our strength. We look around and see the wondrous mercies that have been afforded us. We take in the scenery. We pick up the pace, wave to the neighbors, run with our head held high, run until our legs start to feel stronger, until our lungs are filled with praise, until our heart starts to beat with His. We run until we realize that while we might have mapped out a plan, He has a greater one. He has a plan that might not lead us where we thought - as a matter of fact, it probably won't - yet, we look around and can see that you are right where you are supposed to be. We are running out of praise, out of love, out of thankfulness, out of excitement for the future.
I have been in both pairs of shoes...on both paths. I ran out of desperation. I ran until I realized that unless I am running out of love, I'm not going to be able to complete the course. I ran until, exhausted, I finally decided that nothing, not even the pot holes, briers, and dogs, could be worse than that feeling. Nothing could be worse than always trying to run faster - and not being able to outrun the true reason I felt couldn't stop - because no matter how fast I ran, I couldn't outrun myself. I woke up and realized that I was so tangled up in everything, that I was really running in place, like on a treadmill, and it would never end. I took off the blinders, looked around, and promptly broke down.
Then thankfully, I began to run again. I began to move in a new way, with new thoughts, with new beginnings. I stepped off the treadmill, and hit the road. I gave it over, and now I no longer run alone. I always have Him there to guide me. I have Him to run ahead, check out the path, and tell me how to proceed. Now, do I always go with the plan? I would like to say, yes, however, sometimes I forget that I don't have to do it on my own. You know what, though? As soon as I come back to my senses, He is still there waiting. Always waiting for me. Always reminding me that the path ahead will lead to good things. Always telling me that even when it's raining, when the mosquitoes are out, when the sun is so hot it is almost like the pavement is melting, when the path is bumpy, He is right there.
So, tonight, I am thankful. I'm thankful for this beautiful weather, thankful for this beautiful life. I am most thankful for His plan for my life. I am ready to put on my running shoes and continue to run into my destiny. The one that is created just for me - not out of desperation, but out of love. I am thankful that I don't have to do it on my own, because truly I am not that strong.
I hope y'all have a wonderful night! I am so looking forward to literally putting on my running shoes tomorrow, and taking it outside! Woo hoo!
Grilling Out...Starting Fires?
Originally Posted July 2, 2008
Ok, so I think the exact quote was - "Mama, this is so fun. This is so exciting!! This is the first time we've grilled out that we didn't start a fire!!!". You know...kids don't forget a darn thing, ever! Two times of almost starting fires with a grill and you're forever labeled as a danger. Geez!
Most of y'all know the bad grilling stories, so I won't get back into that now, but needless to say, after 4 years, I decided to try my hand at grilling again. This time I prepared though. I read the "Girls Guide to Grilling" over the weekend, even bought myself a grilling spatula. I bought my grill AND put it together myself. Ok, so it only cooks four or five hamburgers at once, but I still put it together. I got everything else together, grabbed my grill, my new spatula, the long lighter, and went outside to light the grill.
Let me insert here that I'm glad Johnny was coming up at that moment to drop JD off because I had bought the smallest bag of charcoal and it said to use the whole bag and I am a rule follower to fault. However, Johnny took one look at the bag and said it would fill my whole grill up with charcoal, so half a bag was all I needed. Now I have enough for another time. Anyways, off track in this story again...
The grill is lit and HOLY SMOKES some good flames came up, but I was reassured that was right. JD and I sat on the steps and watched the charcoal turn white and talked. He thinks that in the future we will have instagrills that cook burgers in seconds on a charcoal grill. I reminded him that if it only took seconds we wouldn't be able to sit outside talking like we were - and let me tell you, JD and I can do a LOT of talking in an hour outside with no TV, cell phones, Nintendos or other items to distract us from our communication skills. Plus, he was a good runner. I made him get the pans and stuff I needed while I watched our burgers - then hot dogs - then sausage. I might have cooked too much.
Laura, Scott, the kids, and the dog came over to share in our "Kim and JD celebrate the 4th of July Spectacular on July 1st". That is why we were grilling out. JD will be with Johnny and he wanted to celebrate 4th of July with me, too. So, in our unconventional way, we did. I only dropped 2 hot dogs,which Buffy was happy about. I guess I need more utensils than just a spatula. =)
The true test came when we sat down to eat. Holy smokes, it was good. It was really really good. It was good enough that at 5:00 this morning, JD wakes up and says "Mom, those burgers last night were DELICIOUS!!!". That is another thing...diet Sunkist has caffeine in it. I didn't realize that until right before bed last night. Both of us drank enough diet Sunkist to float a boat, so we were awake a LOT! It was worth it.
I'm glad we don't have those insta-grills, yet. If so, I wouldn't have been sitting there minding my own burgers when JD says "Mama, this is so fun. This is so exciting!! This is the first time we've grilled out that we didn't start a fire!!!". I laughed until I almost cried. He was serious, and it was funny. Then I said "Well son, I've still got time. Let's don't count our chickens until all our food is inside and the grill is cool." We both laughed at that.
All in all, I would have to say our cook-out went off pretty good. Heck, who knows? I could become professional grill master. Well...maybe not so much.
This life is a beautiful one!
Ok, so I think the exact quote was - "Mama, this is so fun. This is so exciting!! This is the first time we've grilled out that we didn't start a fire!!!". You know...kids don't forget a darn thing, ever! Two times of almost starting fires with a grill and you're forever labeled as a danger. Geez!
Most of y'all know the bad grilling stories, so I won't get back into that now, but needless to say, after 4 years, I decided to try my hand at grilling again. This time I prepared though. I read the "Girls Guide to Grilling" over the weekend, even bought myself a grilling spatula. I bought my grill AND put it together myself. Ok, so it only cooks four or five hamburgers at once, but I still put it together. I got everything else together, grabbed my grill, my new spatula, the long lighter, and went outside to light the grill.
Let me insert here that I'm glad Johnny was coming up at that moment to drop JD off because I had bought the smallest bag of charcoal and it said to use the whole bag and I am a rule follower to fault. However, Johnny took one look at the bag and said it would fill my whole grill up with charcoal, so half a bag was all I needed. Now I have enough for another time. Anyways, off track in this story again...
The grill is lit and HOLY SMOKES some good flames came up, but I was reassured that was right. JD and I sat on the steps and watched the charcoal turn white and talked. He thinks that in the future we will have instagrills that cook burgers in seconds on a charcoal grill. I reminded him that if it only took seconds we wouldn't be able to sit outside talking like we were - and let me tell you, JD and I can do a LOT of talking in an hour outside with no TV, cell phones, Nintendos or other items to distract us from our communication skills. Plus, he was a good runner. I made him get the pans and stuff I needed while I watched our burgers - then hot dogs - then sausage. I might have cooked too much.
Laura, Scott, the kids, and the dog came over to share in our "Kim and JD celebrate the 4th of July Spectacular on July 1st". That is why we were grilling out. JD will be with Johnny and he wanted to celebrate 4th of July with me, too. So, in our unconventional way, we did. I only dropped 2 hot dogs,which Buffy was happy about. I guess I need more utensils than just a spatula. =)
The true test came when we sat down to eat. Holy smokes, it was good. It was really really good. It was good enough that at 5:00 this morning, JD wakes up and says "Mom, those burgers last night were DELICIOUS!!!". That is another thing...diet Sunkist has caffeine in it. I didn't realize that until right before bed last night. Both of us drank enough diet Sunkist to float a boat, so we were awake a LOT! It was worth it.
I'm glad we don't have those insta-grills, yet. If so, I wouldn't have been sitting there minding my own burgers when JD says "Mama, this is so fun. This is so exciting!! This is the first time we've grilled out that we didn't start a fire!!!". I laughed until I almost cried. He was serious, and it was funny. Then I said "Well son, I've still got time. Let's don't count our chickens until all our food is inside and the grill is cool." We both laughed at that.
All in all, I would have to say our cook-out went off pretty good. Heck, who knows? I could become professional grill master. Well...maybe not so much.
This life is a beautiful one!
Celebrating Life...
Originally Posted December 6, 2007
We all know what tomorrow is for our country, but tomorrow is an important day in my life for another reason. It is on this day 60 years ago that my mother was born. Wow...I can hardly believe that my mom would have been 60 tomorrow. I can't picture her at that age.
In all honesty, how I usually picture her is on this day 10 years ago, when we celebrated her 50th birthday. All of my sisters were in town, which was a very rare occasion. It was cold, much like today. I was 18 and thought I owned the world. I was only a few short months away from being married and believed that everything would work out perfectly. On this night though we went to McGuire's.
I've thought about my mom this evening. It is strange how time can change a memory and what was once so fresh in your mind, is now a fading impression of what used to be. I can't really remember her laugh anymore, yet, I can fully hear her saying "KIMBERLY SUZETTE!!!".
In some ways I am so confident in my role as mother. I realize that no matter what happens in life - whether your mom was Mom of the Year every year your whole life, or if your mom seriously lacked in areas, the bottom line is that no one will ever be your mother. As a woman, it is especially hard sometimes to know that no one on this Earth is supposed to love you like your mom and when that person is gone, who is supposed to fill that spot? Who is the person that was there when you were born, held your hand when you were hurt, took pictures of your first prom, taught you about life - in some good ways and in bad, was supposed to love everything about you inside and out? We learn a lot from our mothers. Sometimes we want to grow up and be exactly who they were, sometimes we want to take their mistakes and not make them ours. No matter what, the bottom line is that you only have one mother.
So tonight, if your mom is still here, maybe you should give her a call. After all, that night 10 years ago, I really had no way of knowing how much life would change - and just how quick. No way of knowing that in just under 2 and a half years later, when I was just 21 and she was just 52, that my mom would no longer be here. And that honestly, what she taught me in the end, is that sometimes things really don't "just work out". Sometimes things are left unresolved and you just have to believe that God is still in control. You just have to believe that God knew how things would end. Then you have to make a promise to yourself to try and live everyday with a fullness of life and a thankful heart. You have to decide to make the past the past and go on.
So, tomorrow, this time 60 years ago, in essence started a life that would ultimately bring me where I am today. And for that, I am thankful beyond what I can even articulate. I am thankful for this opportunity at life. I am thankful that I can be a mom to my son. I thank her, for giving me this chance.
I thank you Lord for making me whole.
~Especially tonight - this life is a beautiful one!~
We all know what tomorrow is for our country, but tomorrow is an important day in my life for another reason. It is on this day 60 years ago that my mother was born. Wow...I can hardly believe that my mom would have been 60 tomorrow. I can't picture her at that age.
In all honesty, how I usually picture her is on this day 10 years ago, when we celebrated her 50th birthday. All of my sisters were in town, which was a very rare occasion. It was cold, much like today. I was 18 and thought I owned the world. I was only a few short months away from being married and believed that everything would work out perfectly. On this night though we went to McGuire's.
I've thought about my mom this evening. It is strange how time can change a memory and what was once so fresh in your mind, is now a fading impression of what used to be. I can't really remember her laugh anymore, yet, I can fully hear her saying "KIMBERLY SUZETTE!!!".
In some ways I am so confident in my role as mother. I realize that no matter what happens in life - whether your mom was Mom of the Year every year your whole life, or if your mom seriously lacked in areas, the bottom line is that no one will ever be your mother. As a woman, it is especially hard sometimes to know that no one on this Earth is supposed to love you like your mom and when that person is gone, who is supposed to fill that spot? Who is the person that was there when you were born, held your hand when you were hurt, took pictures of your first prom, taught you about life - in some good ways and in bad, was supposed to love everything about you inside and out? We learn a lot from our mothers. Sometimes we want to grow up and be exactly who they were, sometimes we want to take their mistakes and not make them ours. No matter what, the bottom line is that you only have one mother.
So tonight, if your mom is still here, maybe you should give her a call. After all, that night 10 years ago, I really had no way of knowing how much life would change - and just how quick. No way of knowing that in just under 2 and a half years later, when I was just 21 and she was just 52, that my mom would no longer be here. And that honestly, what she taught me in the end, is that sometimes things really don't "just work out". Sometimes things are left unresolved and you just have to believe that God is still in control. You just have to believe that God knew how things would end. Then you have to make a promise to yourself to try and live everyday with a fullness of life and a thankful heart. You have to decide to make the past the past and go on.
So, tomorrow, this time 60 years ago, in essence started a life that would ultimately bring me where I am today. And for that, I am thankful beyond what I can even articulate. I am thankful for this opportunity at life. I am thankful that I can be a mom to my son. I thank her, for giving me this chance.
I thank you Lord for making me whole.
~Especially tonight - this life is a beautiful one!~
Talents
Posted December 4, 2007
If God gives us all talents and gifts to use to serve Him, I've often wondered what mine are. I mean, let's face it...I sing loud, but not well. I can definitely play a musical instrument, but it's been a while. Ok, so I can worship. Actually, I love to worship. However, when you think about conventional talents, I often think that I lack in this department. I can make people laugh, but is that a talent? I'm not so certain. I think I can be a great listener (hard to believe with as much as I talk, huh?), but really that's not a talent. I tend to attract strangers in Wal-Mart. I mean, not guys hitting on me in Wal-Mart although that does occasionally happen. I mean that people just walk up to me and start talking to me, not just in Wal-Mart, but in all public places. Is that a talent? It's kind of bizarre, but not what one would consider a talent. And before you jump to conclusions, NO, I don't start talking to them first. I really can't explain it. I don't really even notice it anymore, usually someone I'm with will say "Did you notice that 4 people have come up and talked to you since we've been here - and that's not including the 3 people you saw that you knew?" Is being friendly a talent?
Anyways, I looked up the word "talent" to see what it is defined as...."a special often creative aptitude - a marked innate ability". So, I naturally talk...a lot..is that a talent? I think some would consider it a challenge. ha!
Well, all this pondering lead me to thinking about how God has made each of us different. No two of us are the same. Yes, I know that we've all heard that over and over since the time we were little, but have you ever really stopped to think about what that meant? Ever really took a moment to think about how awesome it is that our Creator took the time to make each of us in a unique way that ultimately is pleasing to Him? Wow...that is kind of refreshing. That means that bump in my nose, or my crooked pinkie fingers *yes, they look kind of funny* was done on purpose. That means that my huge feet for such a short person, were not a mistake. That means the fact that I can talk to almost anyone one on one perfectly fine - could even entertain a whole room of people, but get me up front and make me believe that everyone has to listen to me and I break out in hives - Holy smokes! That was done of purpose! Hmmmmm.....that also means that I was given a unique personality, complete with unique thoughts. I was made to be exactly the person that I am. That also means that even if I don't see my talents right off, that God placed them in me for a reason. That is such an interesting concept. If you really think about it, maybe you'll appreciate the things about yourself that make you unique. I mean, hey if God thought to put that there, who am I to argue?
I guess that means I'll continue to talk to strangers at Wal-Mart, listen to their stories on their lives, help them pick out candles, give them a quick smile. Heck, maybe the only person who was nice to them that day was me. Could you imagine how sad it would be to know that the only person you talked to all day, or who took an interest in you at all, was a stranger at a grocery store? How much sadder would it be if that stranger had walked away unaware that they had an opportunity to brighten some one's day?
We all have some kind of gifts to bring to the table, why not celebrate that?
If God gives us all talents and gifts to use to serve Him, I've often wondered what mine are. I mean, let's face it...I sing loud, but not well. I can definitely play a musical instrument, but it's been a while. Ok, so I can worship. Actually, I love to worship. However, when you think about conventional talents, I often think that I lack in this department. I can make people laugh, but is that a talent? I'm not so certain. I think I can be a great listener (hard to believe with as much as I talk, huh?), but really that's not a talent. I tend to attract strangers in Wal-Mart. I mean, not guys hitting on me in Wal-Mart although that does occasionally happen. I mean that people just walk up to me and start talking to me, not just in Wal-Mart, but in all public places. Is that a talent? It's kind of bizarre, but not what one would consider a talent. And before you jump to conclusions, NO, I don't start talking to them first. I really can't explain it. I don't really even notice it anymore, usually someone I'm with will say "Did you notice that 4 people have come up and talked to you since we've been here - and that's not including the 3 people you saw that you knew?" Is being friendly a talent?
Anyways, I looked up the word "talent" to see what it is defined as...."a special often creative aptitude - a marked innate ability". So, I naturally talk...a lot..is that a talent? I think some would consider it a challenge. ha!
Well, all this pondering lead me to thinking about how God has made each of us different. No two of us are the same. Yes, I know that we've all heard that over and over since the time we were little, but have you ever really stopped to think about what that meant? Ever really took a moment to think about how awesome it is that our Creator took the time to make each of us in a unique way that ultimately is pleasing to Him? Wow...that is kind of refreshing. That means that bump in my nose, or my crooked pinkie fingers *yes, they look kind of funny* was done on purpose. That means that my huge feet for such a short person, were not a mistake. That means the fact that I can talk to almost anyone one on one perfectly fine - could even entertain a whole room of people, but get me up front and make me believe that everyone has to listen to me and I break out in hives - Holy smokes! That was done of purpose! Hmmmmm.....that also means that I was given a unique personality, complete with unique thoughts. I was made to be exactly the person that I am. That also means that even if I don't see my talents right off, that God placed them in me for a reason. That is such an interesting concept. If you really think about it, maybe you'll appreciate the things about yourself that make you unique. I mean, hey if God thought to put that there, who am I to argue?
I guess that means I'll continue to talk to strangers at Wal-Mart, listen to their stories on their lives, help them pick out candles, give them a quick smile. Heck, maybe the only person who was nice to them that day was me. Could you imagine how sad it would be to know that the only person you talked to all day, or who took an interest in you at all, was a stranger at a grocery store? How much sadder would it be if that stranger had walked away unaware that they had an opportunity to brighten some one's day?
We all have some kind of gifts to bring to the table, why not celebrate that?
Lessons Learned...
Posted October 21, 2007
Here are somethings I've learned in my 28 and a half years here:
Being happy is a choice. Sometimes if you can make yourself smile, you really will feel better. However, sometimes crying is just the thing you will need. My child thinks I'm awesome - he's my biggest fan, and I'm his. I can't change things that happened as a child, but I can learn from them. I can forgive people, too. I'm going to need that same forgiveness. Sometimes, you meet someone and they are a jerk....they aren't going to change just for you. Sometimes your first impression is right on the mark. Sometimes you need to revise that first impression, or you might miss out on something good. An ordinary day can turn into a day that you look back on and know that it was a defining moment in your life. Be prepared. You need a sense of humor. It's ok to laugh at yourself, shoot I'm my biggest source of entertainment. Everyone does not think like me - and that works both ways. I'm not always right. Sometimes I'm right and I don't need to tell everyone that - but sometimes I do. Being a single mom is hard work, heck being a parent period is hard work. It is sooooo worth it! Life isn't best played on the sidelines. Older men and married men seem to think I'm a catch. Somehow that doesn't make me feel any better. =) Cheeseburgers only feel good for a few minutes. Exercise feels good for a long time. Jumping rope was way easier as a kid. There is nothing wrong with just being me. I still don't like to do laundry. I still have to do laundry. Singing in the car makes me relax...and the other drivers get a good laugh. God really does have a plan. Sometimes it just seems like it takes forever for that plan to be revealed. The train is always going to be the longest one ever when you are running late getting back from lunch. You can spend everyday wishing for something else and never take the time to appreciate where you are today. Unhappy people generally blame everyone else. Kindness goes a long way. I will make mistakes and misjudge people. I will get my heart broken. Every now and then, I'm going to just have a bad day. With a little nudge I would be adventurous. I am a great mom. Above all else...once again...God really does have a plan and it really is worth it.
Here are somethings I've learned in my 28 and a half years here:
Being happy is a choice. Sometimes if you can make yourself smile, you really will feel better. However, sometimes crying is just the thing you will need. My child thinks I'm awesome - he's my biggest fan, and I'm his. I can't change things that happened as a child, but I can learn from them. I can forgive people, too. I'm going to need that same forgiveness. Sometimes, you meet someone and they are a jerk....they aren't going to change just for you. Sometimes your first impression is right on the mark. Sometimes you need to revise that first impression, or you might miss out on something good. An ordinary day can turn into a day that you look back on and know that it was a defining moment in your life. Be prepared. You need a sense of humor. It's ok to laugh at yourself, shoot I'm my biggest source of entertainment. Everyone does not think like me - and that works both ways. I'm not always right. Sometimes I'm right and I don't need to tell everyone that - but sometimes I do. Being a single mom is hard work, heck being a parent period is hard work. It is sooooo worth it! Life isn't best played on the sidelines. Older men and married men seem to think I'm a catch. Somehow that doesn't make me feel any better. =) Cheeseburgers only feel good for a few minutes. Exercise feels good for a long time. Jumping rope was way easier as a kid. There is nothing wrong with just being me. I still don't like to do laundry. I still have to do laundry. Singing in the car makes me relax...and the other drivers get a good laugh. God really does have a plan. Sometimes it just seems like it takes forever for that plan to be revealed. The train is always going to be the longest one ever when you are running late getting back from lunch. You can spend everyday wishing for something else and never take the time to appreciate where you are today. Unhappy people generally blame everyone else. Kindness goes a long way. I will make mistakes and misjudge people. I will get my heart broken. Every now and then, I'm going to just have a bad day. With a little nudge I would be adventurous. I am a great mom. Above all else...once again...God really does have a plan and it really is worth it.
Waking Up Worrying...
Originally Posted October 2, 2007
I find it amazing sometimes how you can read something, and then when you least expect it, that will come rushing back to you so clearly that you know it was meant for that exact moment.
This morning, I woke up at the great time of 3:30. I know, I know...what am I doing up that early? Well, honestly, I woke up worrying. There are a lot of things going on this week and being the over analyzer that I am, I woke up trying to figure out the future. A funny thing happened though...I woke up and headed down the worrying path, when suddenly this thought came to my head
"Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?"
I almost started laughing at the irony. Here I am, wide awake at 3:30, trying to worry about things that I have no control over, and into my mind pops a scripture that I've read a hundred times. Did I go back to sleep? Well, of course not. I didn't worry like I was, but once I'm up - I'm pretty much up, so I went and got a nice relaxing bath instead.
Well, tonight I decided to look that scripture up and reread that passage. What touched my heart is not so much the part that I remembered, but the part a little ways after....
"Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don't work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?...Seek the kingdom of God above all else and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. Matthew 6:27-30 & 33
Once again, I am truly amazed by how the mind works. However, I am even more amazed at how God works. So, tonight, I am considering the lilies, and thanking God that He already has everything under control. As the Bible says, if He takes care of the flowers, how much more so does He love and want to take care of me?
Now, I'm off to sleep....after all, I've been up since 3:30. =)
I find it amazing sometimes how you can read something, and then when you least expect it, that will come rushing back to you so clearly that you know it was meant for that exact moment.
This morning, I woke up at the great time of 3:30. I know, I know...what am I doing up that early? Well, honestly, I woke up worrying. There are a lot of things going on this week and being the over analyzer that I am, I woke up trying to figure out the future. A funny thing happened though...I woke up and headed down the worrying path, when suddenly this thought came to my head
"Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?"
I almost started laughing at the irony. Here I am, wide awake at 3:30, trying to worry about things that I have no control over, and into my mind pops a scripture that I've read a hundred times. Did I go back to sleep? Well, of course not. I didn't worry like I was, but once I'm up - I'm pretty much up, so I went and got a nice relaxing bath instead.
Well, tonight I decided to look that scripture up and reread that passage. What touched my heart is not so much the part that I remembered, but the part a little ways after....
"Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don't work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?...Seek the kingdom of God above all else and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. Matthew 6:27-30 & 33
Once again, I am truly amazed by how the mind works. However, I am even more amazed at how God works. So, tonight, I am considering the lilies, and thanking God that He already has everything under control. As the Bible says, if He takes care of the flowers, how much more so does He love and want to take care of me?
Now, I'm off to sleep....after all, I've been up since 3:30. =)
Random Events...
Originally Posted July 12, 2007
So, these are just random things that have happened to me in the last few days.....
Monday, my friend Theresa and I went to lunch. As we are leaving the gentleman (loose term here) behind the counter sees my work badge and says "Is that an old picture of you?" I smile and say "Actually, it was just from April". He takes a second looks at me and says "You look better with long hair. You need to let it grow back out. Oh, and you look older in person." At which point I just smile and say "Why thank you, sir, I'll keep that in mind." That was hilarious. I definitely wasn't expecting that one!
Yesterday I went to get my oil changed. It was just a tiny bit overdue (ok, maybe it's more than a tiny bit overdue, but there's only one person who knows for sure how long it's been and they better not be talking... )and I knew I needed to get it changed, so I went on my lunch break to take care of that. I went to one of those 10 minute oil change places and there was no wait...what a blessing! Then came the part I hate...when they try to sell you all kinds of extra things to where my $35 oil change would have cost $391. Sometimes I wonder if I were a guy (not that I want to be a guy thank you very much...I'm extremely happy being me) if they would treat me the same way. Needless to say, the guy came in about 5 times and tried his best to get me to buy all kinds of things. Well, I left....w/only the $35 oil change. I was so proud of myself for taking care of my stuff. Then, I get back to work and look down....I ruined one of my favorite pair of pants. They had black oily stuff on the legs. I pulled out my Tide pen and got most of it off, but it was still there. As my pants are drying someone comes by and tells me that we have to go visit a couple of departments. The departments recently hired new employees and their managers wanted them to meet me.....great....meet new people with dirty pants! Luckily, I hadn't sat in anything - that would come later.
After work, Veronica asked me if I would ride to Hobby Lobby with her. Which I've got to say...I love V, but I hate Hobby Lobby. I said yes and we decided to eat our standard O'Charlie's salads before we went in to Hobby Lobby. Now you have to understand, when we go to O'Charlies it's like time slows down when they see us coming. We are always there for a long time and we never order anything but salads, so why it takes so long....I'm not certain. Anyways, we are sitting there laughing up a storm and there are 2 guys at the table behind us. One turns around and wants to know if they could buy us a "Pinktini" drink because they want to see what it looks like, but neither one wants to drink a pink drink. Well, we said sure. Before you jump to conclusions....No, these guys were not hitting on us. If they had been hitting on us, we wouldn't have allowed them to buy the drink. We just don't play that way...she's married and I'm not interested. They didn't even really say anything else after the drink came out. Well, since V was driving, I took a sip thinking I would just humor the guys who paid $8 for a drink. Turns out, the drink is good. I ended up drinking it.....which in turn made me VERY sleepy and a little extra giggly!
We left and went to Hobby Lobby, which always makes me feel seriously inadequate. I can make up stories and songs off the top of my head, but ask me to prepare a craft and I break out in hives. It's like this.....when people like Veronica and Laura walk into Hobby Lobby it's like the heavens part and angels sing for the chosen children have come home. When I walk in it is almost like the old west town where the whole town closes up and tumble weed rolls down the street because something bad is about to happen. Well, we made our purchases quickly and leave...at which point V says "When did you get all that stuff on the back of your pants?" Yes, for all of those who think it's funny when someone sits in something, I had somehow gotten black stuff on the back and side of my pants......needless to say, the pants are ruined!
Then today, I get up early to go to Krispy Kreme. We had a department meeting at work and I needed to stop and pick up doughnuts. I arrive at Krispy Kreme at 6:30 where I promptly do the mexican stand off with the only two workers in the store....I stare at them and they stare at me for about five minutes before one of them decides I must be a real customer trying to buy real doughnuts. I politely tell the young lady that I need a dozen assorted doughnuts and a dozen glazed, when I hear "I'm sorry, we don't have doughnuts". I thought I had heard wrong, so I ask again. She says "I said we don't have any glazed doughnuts". I immediately look around like maybe I am not really in a doughnut shop. She tells me I can come back in 20-30 minutes and then they will have doughnuts. I just smiled and walked with a look of amazement on my face out the door. I mean, that's like going into Starbucks and being told they don't have coffee!! I came back about an hour later, ordered the doughnuts and a frozen coffee and the same lady gets my frozen coffee. When I ask her for a lid, she comes back and says "We didn't have any regular lids, so I took the scissors and cut a hole in this one for you" as long as it works....
I think sometimes God allows bizarre things to happen to me because He knows that I am going to get a good kick out of it!
So, these are just random things that have happened to me in the last few days.....
Monday, my friend Theresa and I went to lunch. As we are leaving the gentleman (loose term here) behind the counter sees my work badge and says "Is that an old picture of you?" I smile and say "Actually, it was just from April". He takes a second looks at me and says "You look better with long hair. You need to let it grow back out. Oh, and you look older in person." At which point I just smile and say "Why thank you, sir, I'll keep that in mind." That was hilarious. I definitely wasn't expecting that one!
Yesterday I went to get my oil changed. It was just a tiny bit overdue (ok, maybe it's more than a tiny bit overdue, but there's only one person who knows for sure how long it's been and they better not be talking... )and I knew I needed to get it changed, so I went on my lunch break to take care of that. I went to one of those 10 minute oil change places and there was no wait...what a blessing! Then came the part I hate...when they try to sell you all kinds of extra things to where my $35 oil change would have cost $391. Sometimes I wonder if I were a guy (not that I want to be a guy thank you very much...I'm extremely happy being me) if they would treat me the same way. Needless to say, the guy came in about 5 times and tried his best to get me to buy all kinds of things. Well, I left....w/only the $35 oil change. I was so proud of myself for taking care of my stuff. Then, I get back to work and look down....I ruined one of my favorite pair of pants. They had black oily stuff on the legs. I pulled out my Tide pen and got most of it off, but it was still there. As my pants are drying someone comes by and tells me that we have to go visit a couple of departments. The departments recently hired new employees and their managers wanted them to meet me.....great....meet new people with dirty pants! Luckily, I hadn't sat in anything - that would come later.
After work, Veronica asked me if I would ride to Hobby Lobby with her. Which I've got to say...I love V, but I hate Hobby Lobby. I said yes and we decided to eat our standard O'Charlie's salads before we went in to Hobby Lobby. Now you have to understand, when we go to O'Charlies it's like time slows down when they see us coming. We are always there for a long time and we never order anything but salads, so why it takes so long....I'm not certain. Anyways, we are sitting there laughing up a storm and there are 2 guys at the table behind us. One turns around and wants to know if they could buy us a "Pinktini" drink because they want to see what it looks like, but neither one wants to drink a pink drink. Well, we said sure. Before you jump to conclusions....No, these guys were not hitting on us. If they had been hitting on us, we wouldn't have allowed them to buy the drink. We just don't play that way...she's married and I'm not interested. They didn't even really say anything else after the drink came out. Well, since V was driving, I took a sip thinking I would just humor the guys who paid $8 for a drink. Turns out, the drink is good. I ended up drinking it.....which in turn made me VERY sleepy and a little extra giggly!
We left and went to Hobby Lobby, which always makes me feel seriously inadequate. I can make up stories and songs off the top of my head, but ask me to prepare a craft and I break out in hives. It's like this.....when people like Veronica and Laura walk into Hobby Lobby it's like the heavens part and angels sing for the chosen children have come home. When I walk in it is almost like the old west town where the whole town closes up and tumble weed rolls down the street because something bad is about to happen. Well, we made our purchases quickly and leave...at which point V says "When did you get all that stuff on the back of your pants?" Yes, for all of those who think it's funny when someone sits in something, I had somehow gotten black stuff on the back and side of my pants......needless to say, the pants are ruined!
Then today, I get up early to go to Krispy Kreme. We had a department meeting at work and I needed to stop and pick up doughnuts. I arrive at Krispy Kreme at 6:30 where I promptly do the mexican stand off with the only two workers in the store....I stare at them and they stare at me for about five minutes before one of them decides I must be a real customer trying to buy real doughnuts. I politely tell the young lady that I need a dozen assorted doughnuts and a dozen glazed, when I hear "I'm sorry, we don't have doughnuts". I thought I had heard wrong, so I ask again. She says "I said we don't have any glazed doughnuts". I immediately look around like maybe I am not really in a doughnut shop. She tells me I can come back in 20-30 minutes and then they will have doughnuts. I just smiled and walked with a look of amazement on my face out the door. I mean, that's like going into Starbucks and being told they don't have coffee!! I came back about an hour later, ordered the doughnuts and a frozen coffee and the same lady gets my frozen coffee. When I ask her for a lid, she comes back and says "We didn't have any regular lids, so I took the scissors and cut a hole in this one for you" as long as it works....
I think sometimes God allows bizarre things to happen to me because He knows that I am going to get a good kick out of it!
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