Lately, I've had an old blog post on my mind. Sometimes I blog because I think that maybe - just maybe - if someone stumbled across this they might read something that would encourage them where they are. However, I also blog just for myself. It's a stress reliever, an outlet, a way to remember some of my past journeys - a story, written in my own words, which I sometimes come back to just to reflect on where I've been, where I am, and where I'm going.
So, even though this post was originally written in the Fall, and it certainly is not Fall-like weather outside, I wanted to share this again. Pretty appropriate that with all the running I've been doing lately training for the half marathon I would be thinking of an old post about running.
I hope you enjoy....and although it was 100 degrees outside today, I still look forward to going out and running tomorrow. =)
Originally Posted October 20, 2008
Okay, so I know I tend to blog a lot about the same things...however, I guess it's just me. Maybe that means God is trying to tell me something and apparently He feels the need to tell me over and over because I'm a little thick headed. In turn, I share it with y'all.
Tonight, I decided to run down the road for something...not literally, but in the car. It was right before the sun was starting to set, and as I headed out I couldn't help but notice just how beautiful it was outside. It just felt clean. I ran my errand, and headed back west - right into the beautiful sunset. I felt like I could drive forever - and just watch the sun go down. It was a sky filled with colors that really have no names...hard to describe because words like, pink, orange, red, with a hint of blue, just don't seem to describe the majestic painting that was there for all to see. Once again...Fall is here.
This is my probably my favorite time of year to run. The air feels clean and crisp, and after months of feeling like you are breathing under water with all the humidity, you really appreciate the change. It's like one day it is 97 degrees with 98% humidity, and the next it is a nice 80 without humidity.
On my drive tonight I once again began to think about how we are all running. We are either running from something or to something, and sometimes we are doing both.
Sometimes we lace up our shoes and just start running trying to outrun ourselves, or someone else, and we have no destination in mind - just running to get away. We run until we can't breathe, until our legs are jelly, until there is no thought but just putting one foot in front of the other and moving. We run so that we don't have to think. We get up, go to work, go through the motions, compartmentalize, run home, do all of our errands, and run until exhausted, we fall asleep - or not. Even then, we are running to something. However, because we are running blindly, we are not creating our destiny, but desperately just trying to stay out of the pot holes, briars, or ditches that come up. We have our heads down, blinders on, and just can't seem to stop for fear that the stray dog that is chasing us just might catch up. We know that if we stop, we are through. We are running out of desperation.
Then there are the times when we lace up, map out our plan, strap on the iPod, drink some water, open the door to a new day, and begin a run that will put us on the path to fulfilling God's greatness in our life. We say a prayer, we put our faith in Him, and we set out. We start at a nice jog, breathe in the fresh clean air, feel our muscles start to kick in, and realize that this will be a fantastic run. We look at the obstacles around us - the pot holes, briars, ditches, stray dogs - and see them for what they really are - just a test for our strength. We look around and see the wondrous mercies that have been afforded us. We take in the scenery. We pick up the pace, wave to the neighbors, run with our head held high, run until our legs start to feel stronger, until our lungs are filled with praise, until our heart starts to beat with His. We run until we realize that while we might have mapped out a plan, He has a greater one. He has a plan that might not lead us where we thought - as a matter of fact, it probably won't - yet, we look around and can see that you are right where you are supposed to be. We are running out of praise, out of love, out of thankfulness, out of excitement for the future.
I have been in both pairs of shoes...on both paths. I ran out of desperation. I ran until I realized that unless I am running out of love, I'm not going to be able to complete the course. I ran until, exhausted, I finally decided that nothing, not even the pot holes, briars, and dogs, could be worse than that feeling. Nothing could be worse than always trying to run faster - and not being able to outrun the true reason I felt couldn't stop - because no matter how fast I ran, I couldn't outrun myself. I woke up and realized that I was so tangled up in everything, that I was really running in place, like on a treadmill, and it would never end. I took off the blinders, looked around, and promptly broke down.
Then thankfully, I began to run again. I began to move in a new way, with new thoughts, with new beginnings. I stepped off the treadmill, and hit the road. I gave it over, and now I no longer run alone. I always have Him there to guide me. I have Him to run ahead, check out the path, and tell me how to proceed. Now, do I always go with the plan? I would like to say, yes, however, sometimes I forget that I don't have to do it on my own. You know what, though? As soon as I come back to my senses, He is still there waiting. Always waiting for me. Always reminding me that the path ahead will lead to His plan. Always telling me that even when it's raining, when the mosquitoes are out, when the sun is so hot it is almost like the pavement is melting, when the path is bumpy, He is right there.
So, tonight, I am thankful. I'm thankful for this beautiful weather, thankful for this beautiful life. I am most thankful for His plan for my life. I am ready to put on my running shoes and continue to run into my destiny. The one that is created just for me - not out of desperation, but out of love. I am thankful that I don't have to do it on my own, because truly I am not that strong.
I hope y'all have a wonderful night! I am so looking forward to literally putting on my running shoes tomorrow, and taking it outside! Woo hoo!
